Good girls are boring.
Inhibited girls are boring.

I am still a perfectionist at heart. Sure, the streak has faded over the years, but when it comes down to certain things, I have infinite expectations. I am annoyed, because I know perfectionism can be quite unhealthy. I have tried to change. Sometimes, it feels as if the outside changed but the inside didn't. Thus leading to tension. I feel it in my muscles. I know it.

I have this goal, to improve myself whenever I can. I tend to place this goal on others, expect they will do the same. I hate it when other people waste their lives doing nothing, although it's none of my business. I also hate it when people display characteristics that were in me before I tried to changed. And sometimes, I get angry because I haven't changed that part of myself. What I hate is usually what's a large part of myself.

There are two parts of me that fight. I want to accept other people's strengths and weaknesses, the other may see them as liabilities. I get a headache.

TV, is about watching other people's lives. Doing too much of it, you don't get to live. Be aware of things around you. Reality. Some people have to grow up. To grow up, means to live as much as you can. Stop watching other's people lives. Stop envying others. Just live.

You have to be harsh to some people. Otherwise, they won't grow up. Now, is growing up a good thing? Example. If a friend keeps talking pessimistically, sometimes I find it better to shut my friend up. Don't encourage. Don't "listen". Listening everytime, may not be a good way of sharing emotional troubles.

Some things cannot be compromised. There are infinite choices. Life is not only about giving or taking. It is also about neither taking or giving. Sometimes, there is no need to compromise. Just leave things the beautiful way they are, as nature intended. Sure they may not be beautiful, but changing, is something that can be slow sometimes and fast another. I used to be fast about changing myself, but now I don't know.