Horoscopes

You know, I don't really hate horoscopes. They're kind of fun to read sometimes.

What I hate is people believing in them.

I find them to be so restricting. When you believe in them, you restrict yourself to those beliefs. And when the mind is filled, it can't take in any more stuff. Any evidence that is contradicting will be dismissed. And you hold on even more strongly to those beliefs. Then your mind is closed. It's like, believing everything that the church has to say.

Now I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. Perhaps it's good that you have a tether, something to cling to in case you are lost.

But to me, it's a bad thing. I'm a free spirit, and I definitely resist someone telling me what to do, or what I can be.

When you walk one path, you miss out on other paths.

Obsession

I tend to get obsessed over certain things very easily. I fixate my eyes on one thing, and I can get stuck for a long time. Even when I'm doing other things, my mind always goes back to that one thing. It can happen to anything. People, math problems, material things. In short, it's just damn hard for me to LET GO.

I've been trying so hard to protect myself. Because if I fall, I fall DEEP. And it's damn hard to climb out of that hole. And so I've been trying the KISS principle. Keep It Simple and Stupid. Well I guess that's kind of an obsession to be simple. Lol.

The truth is, I just feel too strongly. And I love to pretend that I don't, and maybe sometimes I almost believe that I do! And it tears me up inside without me knowing it. I'm holding so much inside, that sometimes it's like I'm gonna burst.

Sometimes it manages to escape and I do things without inhibition. Then I can't believe how crazy I am. But I am crazy.

I don't know, man. How do I stop this?

Singing workshop

So today I went to a singing workshop at focusmusic with Tiffany thanks to her recommendation.

This is what I learnt:

When singing low or high, use resonance from diaphragm.

Open mouth for more resonance and faster breathing.

Sing to beat. E.g. heavy beat - heavy emphasis etc.

Pronounce words correctly.

Paying attention

It's been a long time since I went out with someone who'll pay full attention to me.
Everybody seems so distracted with their phones.

I mean, seriously. Some virtual world is more important than me?
No, I refuse to do the same thing.

I really wish I didn't mind, but I do.

Ode to the nice guys

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

Fu-zu Jen, SEAS/WH, 2003

No intelligence > Intelligence

Miss Understood: "Intellectuals have a better understanding of the world and therefore see just how f***ed up it is. Stupid people,on the other hand, live in their own little bubbles and pretty much create their own existance, far away from the problems of the real world. Afterall, ignorance is bliss."


Maybe it's easier to be stupid...

But then, I don't want to be stupid... Because, intelligence is beautiful...

FMR!

a.k.a Fk My Results!, or, My Results are Fked!, or Results Fked Me!

So here's the breakdown:

ST2334 - Statistics (A)
I almost always do well in Maths modules - I should totally do a Maths minor.

GEM2900 - Uncertainty and Probability (B+)
I think it was because of this module that I got A for stats. I love you Chen Peiyi!

LSM2201A - Experimental Biochemistry (B-)
I probably could have done better, but it's a life science module so I guess it's acceptable.

LSM2101 - Metabolism and Regulation (C+)
Fk you! I studied damn freaking hard for this module. But once again the life science modules work their voodoo magic. Grrr

CS2102 - Database Systems (C+)
I messed up this one, I swear. But then I didn't really like this module anyway.

ES1102 - English for Academic Purposes (C+)
WTF? Are you kidding me? It's 0MC, but still... My English ain't that bad! Or maybe it is... *sulks*

So, my CAP has increased to 3.19, but it's still a long climb to honours. All thanks to last sem. I'm gonna retake Organic Chemistry this sem, so wish me luck man. I'll really need it.

Sometimes I really feel like giving up... Maybe I'm just not cut out for university life.

glassworks

by imperterrito
Close your eyes and feel it...

Reminiscence

I find that as I grow older, I tend to look back on the "good old days". Is that how old people think? You know, I used to resent how the older people revisit the past all the time. Maybe because I was young and hadn't walked much on the path of life? But now that there's a trail, I would look back on it sometimes. Well I do get that warm fuzzy feeling when I look back on the good ole days. But I suspect it is all a trick of the mind. Memories are so malleable, they might change according to how you feel right now. Sure, they are good old days, but what could possibly be better than now? Living is a miracle and if we abandon this moment, we might as well not live at all.

Oh memory, ye double-edged sword.

Jfreeze - Bubble tea killer

Last Saturday, I had one of the best drinks of my life.

Jollibean J-Freeze ~ Matcha with Azuki beans
Ice-blended green tea with with azuki beans. The ice is blended so well, it tastes like ice cream! And I'm a fan of green tea ice cream! It's not rough like ice kachang. Wow, there's simply no words to describe it. It's heavenly! And it could probably replace a meal too. It's damn filling. The price is $3 or 2.80 without the beans. I must say the price is just right! It's totally worth it! I would buy this over any bubble tea, ANY DAY! In fact, I'm officially quitting bubble tea and jumping ship over to Jollibean!

Sorry for the crappy picture. It really doesn't do the drink justice. But it would be weird not to post a picture, right?

Bubble tea killer gogogogo!

Super damage!

Darn, I just spent a bomb. Sometimes I wonder if I'm really thrifty or not. I realise that I usually spend my money in big chunks.

So, within a month...

I couldn't resist the Dell U2311H. It was totally a steal at $279. I found a two-month old U2311H for $250! I should have haggled more though. But I'm not a fan of haggling. I'm a lousy trader! Anyway the price's very cheap for an IPS monitor. Granted, it's e-IPS, a lousier version of IPS, but it still trumps the usual TN monitors. TN = Twisted Nematic, IPS = In-Plane Switching. The market is saturated with TN monitors right now. TN is cheap, but has lousy colour reproduction compared to IPS. So I upgraded my 20" TN monitor to a 23" IPS monitor. I'm impressed with the increase in screen area. Placing my Samsung 206BW and Dell U2311H side by side, however, I couldn't really differentiate the colour reproduction. There are some differences, but it's hard to tell for the untrained eye. But of course I will never go back to a TN monitor. I hope the market comes out with mainstream IPS monitors soon. IPS really owns TN. I managed to sell my old trusty 206BW for $85 on Ebay. I however, regret not putting the price higher. I guess I was just impatient. I hate to see things collecting dust. There was a $95 offer in the forums... Argh, $10...

Damage = 250 - 85 = 165

Of course, with a bigger monitor, I totally NEEDED a better graphics card. I was sick of ATI's drivers, so I decided to support the green camp - nVIDIA. Seriously nVIDIA's drivers are soooo much better. I like ATI's hardware though. Oh well. Sometimes you just can't have your cake and eat it.

Damage = 275 - 70 = 205

I was sick of my noisy CPU cooler too. So I decided to get a better one. And who else but Coolermaster would I go for? I really like their products. They're cheap, and they work well. Super value for money. I bought the Hyper212+. It's awesome! It was a pain to attach it though. I had to REMOVE the motherboard! My casing does have a hole at the back, but it didn't seem to be built for AMD CPUs. So I couldn't attach one final screw at the back. I tried very hard to do everything without REMOVING the motherboard, but I broke the bracket of the original cooler by mistake. :(

Oh I also bought some 2GB DDR2 ram as well. Damn expensive man. I wished I had bought it during the crazily in supply period. They were $25 a piece then! Now it's twice the price. Wasted man.

Damage = 48 + 56 = 104

-----

My chair broke. So I went shopping at IKEA! Good chairs are reallllyyyy expensive man. In the end, I bought a $219 one. I was very tempted to get the $399 one, since it was approved for office use and would probably last 10 years or more. I think there was warranty too! But I just couldn't bring myself to buy it... While walking to check out, I saw a very very nice wall lamp. It was $29, but I couldn't stand my old yucky flabby wall lamp anymore. It took some trouble to attach it, and I even contemplated buying a drill, but I managed to make do with the old hole on the wall. Somehow. It isn't really perfect, but who cares.

Damage = 219 + 29 = 248

---

That's for last month, but don't forget about the Milestone XT which cost $520, and the new router + adapter combo which cost like $300...

Whew. Sometimes I wish I had deep coffers.

Anyway, that's enough damage for this year man. I must try to save up my money. I must return my bank account to its original state! Sometimes I don't even feel like going out, because going out = spend money. Hikikomori FTW.

Sorry seems to be the easiest word

I'm sick of hearing the word "sorry". It's so overused, it doesn't mean a thing anymore. Granted there are many cases in which the word "sorry" is appropriate, but there are many cases in which it's just a filler word. Something to say when you don't know what else to say. Something that will apparently ease your guilt. It's a frickin' selfish word, I tell ya.

Words are cheap, deeds are priceless. Saying sorry is okay if you follow up with some action to show your remorse. But no. Some just like to repeat their mistakes. Then what's the point of saying sorry?

Please, please. Say sorry only when you truly mean it. Don't say it for the sake of saying it, please. Save the word.

Sorry seems to be the hardest word? Sorry, times have changed.

Edit:
Okay after I posted this I saw this on lifehacker.com
http://jezebel.com/5704364/social-minefield-how-to-say-youre-sorry

Maturity

People form impressions quickly. While I do not approve of that, it is the norm and probably a result of evolution so I will not fault them. Perhaps it's better that way.

Now many have said that I act younger than my age. I concur. Sometimes, I find it amusing that people expect me to do childish stuff. Especially my handwriting. People are surprised that my handwriting looks... so mature. Or rather, people were. I'm probably old enough now that people aren't that surprised anymore. Sometimes, I find it annoying that people think I'm childish, but I brought that upon myself. No, wait, I'm not irked by the fact that they think that I'm childish, but more irked by the fact that they never look beyond. Right, I know I'm not that mature, but I like to believe that I do have some mature qualities inside of me. But then, what is maturity? Maybe it is a childish notion to think that I'm mature. For which child doesn't like to think that they are mature? And, is it good to be mature? How mature is mature?

I find it hard to define maturity. To me, it is something very intangible. Now, perhaps there is at least an agreed standard by which we can call people "mature". That is, good reason and high stability. How mature can one be? Who do we compare to?

Can maturity and childishness coexist? That is the question.

So, do I have low or high self-esteem?

Sometimes, I wonder. I used to think that I have high self-esteem. But now I'm not so sure.

Perhaps my low self-esteem was lurking under the guise of high self-esteem.

What do I do when I'm not sure? Google search, of course.

Ahh, this looks like a reliable page - http://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Tell-If-You-Have-Low-Self-Esteem-and-What-to-Do-About-it-If-You-Do&id=2465860

Let's see...


People with low self-esteem have a low estimation of their inherent worth. They tend to see themselves as inadequate, incompetent, unworthy, less than others, and unlovable. Low self-esteem is closely related to low self-efficacy. Self-efficacy means that you have power to produce effects. 

Nope. Not true to a large extent.

People who value themselves poorly do not believe that they have the power or the ability to make positive things happen in their lives. They believe that they have many limitations and are incapable of the things that they see others be able to accomplish. They tend to see themselves as a victim of circumstances and have a hard time connecting their own decisions and behavior to their outcomes. They don't believe that they have much influence or power over their own lives. 

Definitely not true. I'm a firm believer in the power of actions.
 
This sense of low self-efficacy also extends to not being able to trust their feelings and judgement. They tend to have a hard time sensing "trustworthiness" in others. They distrust their own gut reactions to others. Since they have a great deal of difficulty being assertive, they tend toward extremes of passivity or aggression. They may tend to let people walk all over them, until they reach some threshold of tolerance, then they withdraw into passive aggression or become aggressive. Or they may generally present an aggressive stance that keeps people at a distance.

Hmm... Somewhere in between, I guess?
 
When people trample on their boundaries, they either don't notice, don't believe that there is anything they can do about it, or think that it's because of something that they did. 
These self-doubting folks tend to people-please, trying to project an image of what they imagine others want them to be.  

Probably not true.
 
Self-esteem and self-concept are deeply related. Self-concept is that world view of self, or how you think about who you are. Self-concept includes beliefs, attitudes, and opinions that you hold about yourself and your relationships with the environment and people in it. People with low-self esteem have great difficulty describing self, their beliefs, and opinions. They don't know who they are.  

Hmm... Who am I? Just the average person. What do I believe in? Nothing. Opinions? Pfff. Yep I totally have great difficulty with this.

They tend to see self as a sum of the roles they play and usually believe that they don't do well at the roles. They are self-deprecating. People with low self-esteem engage in negative self-talk. They say hurtful things to themselves inside their own heads that they would not say to others. When complimented they down play the compliment with qualifications or rejection like, "yes, but", or "you're just saying that; you don't mean it". Self-deprecating people focus on the negative aspects of themselves, while ignoring, discounting, or negating positive attributes.  

Yeah I do say negative things to myself about 10% of the time...
 
People suffering from low self-esteem tend to have chaotic and conflicted relationships. They have trouble communicating wants and needs. They tend to expect others to know what they want and need and to give it to them without having to be asked. They expect that because that's how they interact with others. Self-effacing folks tend to feel angry and hurt when others don't reciprocate and do the same thing. They believe them to be self-centered and selfish. Conflict is inevitable due to inability to take risks and put themselves out there. 
If they can't risk letting down defenses long enough to directly tell others what they want and need, the potential for confusion and conflict is immense. Without assertiveness no one can be direct and effective in their communication with others. Folks with low self-esteem tend to vacillate back and forth from passive to aggressive or to engage in passive-aggressive communication. They tend to be emotion driven. They over-react to interpersonal situations in their lives. They believe that their perception of an interpersonal event is the way that it is or was, that there is no other possible way to view it.
Probably to a small extent.

They don't know how to be truly intimate, so they tend to engage in pursuing/distancing dynamics. This is where one person needs a higher level of closeness at any given moment than the other person. The person with the higher need for closeness takes the other's lower need for closeness as evidence of a lack of caring, regard, or interest, and pursuing reassurance that they are still loved. People with low self-esteem have trouble being intimate with others, because to do so, they have to let down their defenses and risk exposing who they really are to someone else. They can't let others see who they really are, because they don't know who they really are. If you don't have a solid sense of self, you can't share it with another person. That is what intimacy is.

Hmm... I do know how to be intimate, but I have trouble being intimate with others... Maybe it's because I'm scared of exposing myself? I'm not sure...
 
Sometimes they are self-sabotaging. They may fear success, or failure, or both. That fear is acted out in subtle ways that keeps things status quo. Fortune-telling of dire consequences of taking chances on change for growth and development keeps them stuck. They fear change. Fear of the unknown is much worse than any discontent and discomfort that they have with present circumstances.

I kind of fear success and failure sometimes, so much that I might try to sabotage myself. Hmm... Change? I like it sometimes, I guess.
 
Fortunately, it is possible to improve one's self-esteem and to change one's self-concept. To improve self concept it is necessary to get to know oneself. This includes getting to know and appreciate one's body, feelings, thoughts, relationships, tastes, opinions, and motives. This is a process. In the midst of self-discovery, it is appropriate to practice self-acceptance, recognizing oneself as less than perfect, yet still worthwhile. Changing how you think is necessary to improve self-esteem. Using cognitive therapy to challenge negative cognitive distortions about oneself, the world, and the future will help. A change in feelings follows a change in thinking.

Right. I try my best to come up with helpful self-talk. I mean, you should treat yourself well, right? Even if no one else does, at least you have yourself!
 
Willingness to risk is crucial. While practicing taking risks, one should begin looking for the benefits of those risks. You cannot learn new things without risking. With trying out new things and discovering one's own competence, more self-efficacy is gained. Taking risks to reveal glimpses of the real person you are, is usually met with acceptance from others rather than their anticipated abandonment. These outcomes help increase self-confidence and a sense of worthiness. When you take the risk to tell others what you want, need, and feel, you learn assertiveness and practice intimacy skills. When you spend time thinking about the connections between your decisions and your situations, you begin to take responsibility for your own decisions and happiness.  When you take responsibility for self, you are empowered.
Whether you are dealing with addiction issues, emotional or mental health issues, relationship issues, or need some additional living skills, my website is available to you. The "Links" page offers a wide range of resources for additional help. There is a "Recommended Readings" page and an "Ask Peggy" column. My site is a work in progress with additional features, articles, and resources being added to it on a regular basis. Check it out at http://www.peggyferguson.com

Well said. Thank you very much. I will keep all that in mind!


Well this is a just for fun, lighthearted post. Generally, I have pretty high self-esteem but there are times when I'm down too. It's pretty hard to define things, since I believe the world isn't black and white as some people do. There's pink, purple, blue, orange, etc... SO many shades!

So, who am I? For me to know and for you to find out! Not that I know, though...

About time... What's nex?

For billions of years, Serangoon(that's where I live) had no shopping malls, no libraries. It does have those small shops littered around, and of course Serangoon Gardens(where all those expensive restaurants and pubs are; not to mention the infamous Chomp-Chomp). But no shopping malls. No, Kovan's Heartland Mall is not counted. Anyway, that's not the point.

Let's fast forward to November 2010. A big shopping mall has been erected. In fact, it's the biggest shopping mall in the North East area. There will also be a library. About time, I say! I was very excited that my little ulu area finally had a modern, air-conditioned shopping mall! But then I thought about it. What's the point of another shopping mall?

But that's beside the point. I'm supposed to be evangelizing nex. Currently, nex is quite empty. Most shops have not moved in yet. But from what I have seen, there are some nice tenants here. Some crazy new shops like Freshness Burger and Barcelonas and Drink Tea. (Well at least they are new to me) And of course, Cold Storage(yay) and the you-guessed-it, Fairprice Xtra. I like. Apparently there's Wendy's too. Nice.

Anyway, I tried Drink Tea, and I must say that it's yet. another. bubble. tea. shop. with. overpriced. prices. I should totally cut down on drinking bubble tea. I realised it's a big waste of money. I find the most value for money to be the everpresent Sweettalk as well as the one at Bencoolen Plaza(must thank Steph for introducing that to me omg).

So what's nex? Yet another shopping mall.

And what's next? Probably more shopping malls and bubble tea shops. And the government says that Singapore has no space.

Self-improvement books

I always feel better about myself after reading a self-improvement book or two. However, some people seem to be embarrassed about reading them.

Perhaps reading self-improvement books implies that you suck and need to become better. But that's not true. Everyone benefits from it. Or maybe people are embarrassed that they have to get better from reading a book. Everyone should read self-improvement books. It's always good to improve yourself, and to learn new insights. Books are one of the greatest teachers.

Module of the semester

Goes to "Understanding Uncertainty and Statistics", GEM2900. Yes it might get a bit technical at times, but it certainly(see what I did there) helped me see things in a new light. Especially the way people misinterpret statistics. It was horrifying. Sally Clark, a mum was convicted of killing her two children because the lawyer misinterpreted the low chance of two babies dying naturally as the chance that she was innocent. Imagine having to go to prison for a crime you didn't commit and right after your two babies died in a row. How cruel.

Anyway, I love this module's exam. It's the only one which I know how to do 95% of the questions. Also, Peiyi rocks. I am totally gonna scout for the modules she teaches and take them. Joking joking. I hope my other statistics module is as doable as this. Fat hope. But I will do my best.

There was another exam on the same day as the GEM2900 exam. Metabolism and Regulation. A life science module, AKA my bane. So I didn't expect much. As expected, there were some lame memory work questions. Remember and win, no-brainer type of questions. I really hate those type of questions, but alas, department of biological sciences is cruel. No surprise. But I was able to answer more questions than I expected. I'll probably get a C again. I was hoping for a B, but C will have to do. Too much effort needed to score good grades in comparison to other types of modules. Btw, I like the modules, but the exams really are sucky.

On a side note, flash cards are really useful for those life science modules. At least it spices things up. And it really works. I did quite well for the mid terms without much effort. But still...

Two more exams left. Wish me luck! Actually, I'll need more than luck. Argh.

I love exams. I'm not kidding. Call me weird or whatever, but I love answering questions. Shading those cute little circles on the answer sheet. Writing long ass answers to questions I know how to do and giving stupid lame answers to the rest of the questions. Yeah, people would probably freak out if I told them that. LOL. What's more, exam period is usually more relaxed than school time. SO I really don't understand how people hate exams. Okay, just to make things clear, I love doing exams but I hate exams. There's a difference.

I love shopping...

...at super big supermarkets. I get immersed in the wide variety of choices and become fascinated by all the different ingredients and how one product is different from the other. And there's no one around to bother you so you can take all the time in the world to look and choose. And with that time passes by so quickly...

Your welcome

My welcome? What do you mean?

It always irks me... Technically it is considered correct if you read it as "youR welcome". But people! There's a difference between you're and your! Not to be a grammar nazi but this is a very simple thing... Is it really worth sacrificing readability so that you can type two characters less?

Ever failed?

By Pretty/Ugly Design
Or better yet. Reframe failure into feedback. Erase failure from your dictionary. There is no failure, only feedback.

Perhaps the feedback won't help you grow. But at least you've learned something from it. Whether you act on that feedback or not is up to you.

Or maybe sometimes you'll grow the wrong way. But that's okay. There's no time to be worrying about that, because you've got a life to live.

The little things do matter

So I was thinking... Little things do add up. $1 saved everyday - $365 in a year. 15mins of something everyday - expert in a year? It's so much easier to take little steps at a time, than it is to take a big step and risk tripping. Something I learned while reading "The Vigorous Mind" a few years back. I don't know how I stumbled upon that book, but I did and I'm glad that I did. I think it was at West Coast Plaza... Popular... Why did I even go there in the first place? In any event, I could not resist buying that book. It had a gray unassuming cover, but I could not take my eyes off it. That says a lot, considering that I don't buy books that often. (Probably not even once a year). I'm a voracious reader and my income probably won't be able to take it. Libraries rule :)

Anyway, I digress. One innovative idea I learned while reading it is that learning one thing will make your other aspects stronger as well. And they don't have to be related as well. The point is to be a stronger and more flexible person. So how do you go about learning things when you have "no time"? The book suggests that we take a little bit of time everyday. And I totally agree with it. I'm sick of people always saying, "I have no time". Is 15 mins a day too much to spare? 15 mins a day really adds up. Don't put off doing something because it's too big of a stretch for your schedule. Take little steps at a time.

Rome wasn't built in a day, was it?

Sugar, sugar, everywhere

Ahh, the ubiquitous high fructose corn syrup. It's everywhere. This morning, I ate hotcakes from McDonalds. Corn syrup is one of the ingredients in the maple syrup provided. In fact, their maple syrup is FAKE. Notice the "artificial maple flavour". I wonder if the maple syrup provided at "Strictly Pancakes" is real. What does real maple syrup taste like anyway?

I just bought this 4-pack "Anlene Concentrate" drink. It's supposed to be healthy, what with high calcium content and essential bone nutrients etc. I look at the ingredients and ahaha! Sucrose is there!

It's the same for the bread I eat almost everyday. Sugar is added!

Refined sugar is everywhere. And that's what making everyone fat. (Except me of course.)

Chilli sauces, tomato sauces, whatever. They all have sugar in them.

Even the health food known as honey has, you guessed it, lots of sugar in it!

Will it ever go away? Smoking and sugar. Those two idiots - are they here to stay?

Super small... Wow

I just bought this super amazingly small wireless adapter. The adapter is smaller than the USB connector. WTF right?! Amazing... Simply amazing... Wow... Truly the world's smallest wireless USB adapter...

Edimax EW-7811Un

Once again

Something broke in him. And it would remain that way. Nothing could be done. And he made a new resolve.

And so despair was born and hope forever lost.

Alive, but so dead.

Tainted for eternity.

It would be a long, long time before his sins are absolved.

I'm grateful

I'm grateful for many things.

I was born without disabilities - I can't imagine not being able to run around or not being able to see anything.

I have enough to eat everyday, and surplus to boot.

I have a family.

I have kind friends.

I have somewhere to belong to.

I have an education.

I'm smart enough.

Hebe.

有时候

有时候,我真的很想放弃。
有时候,我觉得活在这个世界没意义。
多少才足够?

书也是你们逼我读的。
书,不容易读。
可是为什么你们总让我觉得内疚?
我知道工作不容易。
我知道养家不容易。
但是读书也没有你们想象的那么容易。
现在,只光读书是不够的。

你们常说,“你们只需要读书,很难吗?”
可是读书不只是读书。
你们不会了解的,我也不需要你们了解。
也许你们的确比我辛苦。
但我可以说,我现在的确很辛苦。
我不知道你们知不知道。
我天天一副莫不关心的样子,你们也不能探索什么吧。
我也不想让你们担心哦。
可是,有时闷在心里真的很难过。
我只求你们不要天天让我内疚。

是的,我真的不愿意读书,不过既然已经开始,也应该做一个了断。

The Forer Effect

According to http://www.skepdic.com/forer.html

The Forer effect refers to the tendency of people to rate sets of statements as highly accurate for them personally even though the statements could apply to many people.
Psychologist Bertram R. Forer (1914-2000) found that people tend to accept vague and general personality descriptions as uniquely applicable to themselves without realizing that the same description could be applied to just about anyone.
Precisely the reason why I always take horoscopes and other hocus pocus with a grain of salt. The descriptions are so generic that they could apply to any average person.  But of course, the average person does not realise it. For example, you believe that one part of the description fits you very well. Then you will tend to notice new information that reaffirms your belief while discounting any evidence to the contrary.

Yes, they are fun to read and all but I wouldn't let them determine my character. I am who I want to be.

Another amazing painting of a girl...

MICKAELA MARY LEROY by phoenixlu



Lies, all lies...

[After the previous post, I feel emo... So here is a rant...]

Substance, substance... Need more substance... I tire of getting cheated. Everything is a lie...

Too much lies... I have become so skeptical. In fact, I don't believe in anything that people say anymore. I'll just pretend to believe... Because who wants to be doubted? Yep, I'm lying too... There is so much lies in the world anyway. My policy is that - as long as the lie is not harmful, it's fine. And that is a double-edged sword... I begin to doubt anyone saying good stuff. And I have become so nonchalant about things. I'm not surprised if people betray my trust anyway. In fact, I usually put my trust in people fully without really trusting them. Yeah, it's contradictory, but that's how I roll... One good thing about this is that I tend to encourage myself not to make snap judgments... And sometimes, I am quite surprised about who people really are and what they can do... In fact, I will be very touched if people just do small things that show that they can be trusted... 

Also, I believe in the power of the situation. It doesn't matter how one behaves normally. When it comes to different situations, people act unpredictably sometimes... To me, it is always a pleasure to see surprising things come out from certain people... I think that is a pretty rare thing these days, given that so many people judge so quickly... Well it's certainly reasonable since time is scarce and first impressions are all you have... But I am always hopeful. I always have faith. I am skeptical yet hopeful at the same time. Because things are always not what they seem... I am more of an objective person; so sometimes when you say something I would not agree so readily... In fact I may come off as a disagreeable person, when I am just unsurprised and objective...

I think this all comes with not watching too much media and news. It's good to learn about current affairs and such, but I think too much isn't good... The media is always biased, no matter what they propose to be... And when you read the media and magazines, you tend to think that rare things are actually quite common and possible. Like accidents and millionaires and successful people... When you put the focus on them, you forget about the more important things in life... You forget to be satisfied with yourself, with life... You forget to think for yourself, you forget to see the larger picture... The media is evil... I would never encourage my kids to watch TV. And advertisements are just fucked up. I don't even know where to begin... (As an example, notice how smoking is usually portrayed to be a cool thing, in movies and such... Fuck smoking.) And those advertisements that target kids? They are just outright evil. But maybe it's better that they exist. Better that they get exposed to bad stuff and have time to learn from it than never get exposed and get corrupted totally when they are exposed to it.

Just like religion... But that is a topic for another day.

//Very personal
I have trust issues with women, because the hurt I experienced from them outweigh the positives... And I'm guilty of focusing too much on their bad points. That is why I never chase them... I think some of them were probably disappointed by my inaction. But I'm scarred and scared... And so far, nobody has been worthy of me chasing them... (Or maybe that's a lie to protect my ego) And here it is - it's out. A most disturbing fact about me which will change the way you ever think about me again.

And here's something laughable... My fantasy is that someone will come and sweep my feet off, prove that I have been wrong all along, and console my heart... But of course, that is something which will never happen, because only girls wait for Prince Charming... No such thing as Princess Charming... I may act quite masculine sometimes, but I am also quite feminine in my way of thinking... I'm the type who will be willing to be a househusband. But then again, it's quite impossible... What have I to offer anyway? From an evolutionary standpoint, this is not likely to happen...

Sigh, I really do have much emotional baggage huh? But the cheerful side of me is genuine... I don't pretend to be cheerful, and I probably wear my heart on the sleeve... This sounds contradictory to what I said about pretending... But it's possible... I do get hurt easily, but I also recover easily... Or maybe I pretend to recover easily? I don't know... There are so many things about myself that I don't know, but there are also many things about myself that I do know...

Why do men like longer hair on women? Why do women do the things they do? (And a rant...)

An abstract from http://www.peepat.com/blog/helath_is_wealth/why_men_prefer_long_hair.aspx

Tamás Bereczkei, PhD, professor of psychology performed a study in which images of female faces were given varying lengths of hair and then evaluated by men on their attractiveness. “Longer hair had a significant positive effect on the ratings of a woman’s attractiveness; shorter styles did not,” says Bereczkei, who notes that long hair increases the perception of good genes. “Hair is thought to be a track record of your health.” One accurate indicator of health is physical attractiveness; another is hair. Healthy women have lustrous, shiny hair, whereas the hair of sickly people loses its luster. Because hair grows slowly, shoulder-length hair reveals several years of a woman's health status.
Evolutionary psychology - study of the adaptations made due to selection pressure in natural selection. Well, it is certainly true that hair is quite a good indicator of health. I mean, if you look at just the hair from behind a women, you can roughly gauge how old they are. Of course, that's moot if they did something to their hair, such as dyeing it or applying cosmetic products on it. Which brings us to...
So, from this evolutionary psychology perspective, and assuming that women are wanting to make themselves more attractive to men, it would make sense for older and less healthy women to dye their hair as carefully as possible such that it simulates the appearance of the hair of healthy young women.
But it would not make any sense for young, healthy women to dye their hair, since this would make it less attractive. 
And indeed, twenty years ago sensible young women virtually never dyed their hair - except when they wanted to signal their membership of some 'tribe' (such as punks or goths, or being 'arty' ) and this was 1. the less sensible women, and 2. a distinct minority. A proportion of young women also signalled their sexual availability by bleaching their hair blond - although this made their hair very obviously artificial and less attractive.
That's taken from http://charltonteaching.blogspot.com/2010/09/dyed-brown-hair-in-young-women.html.

Well, I do see a lot of women with dyed hair. And it certainly puzzles me that young ladies ruin their hair by dyeing it. Vanity? Fashion? And some even have weird colours. Some of them do look great though. But personally, I feel that black hair is most suitable for Asian women.

I'm also confused about the rationale behind painting nails. Seriously? Does it really make it look better? From a guy's viewpoint, I would certainly prefer all-natural nails. To be honest, painted nails look really fake and ugly to me. It's especially puzzling if they have very nice natural nails and they cover it all with paint. But nail polish is a different thing because I think it makes nails look nicer.

Lack of time

I can never understand when people say they have a lack of time to do something.

Are they really so busy that they don't even have the time to do it? I bet it's just not important enough for them to do. I mean, there are so many "time-wasters" that we do. Waiting for bus: 5 mins. Bus/Train ride: 30 mins. 35 mins. And if you travel to and fro, that's 70 mins. 70 mins!!! 70 mins everyday! Can you imagine what you can accomplish with that?

Then there are little things like bathing quicker, eating quicker... But I would not recommend that. Also, it isn't that hard to spend just 15 mins learning something. For example, you want to learn the guitar. Then take 15 mins to learn it everyday! Don't tell me it's not impossible. Try it! Do it in little chunks, and you realise that you have accomplished so much eventually. It's the little things that matter. And it's easier to do it in little steps.

And why is everybody in such a rush? Life is not a race. Screw time! Focus on what's most important right now. That's right, right now is the most important. Please don't dream your life away. If you do that, then you do not deserve to regret. It will be sad if you wonder about what could have been instead of looking at what's going on around you.

Also, sleep! I don't understand why students like to deprive themselves of sleep. And the worst thing is, they think they feel normal, but it's only because they are used to it! Sleep deprivation can affect concentration more than you can imagine. No time to finish work, really? What if sleeping more allowed you to concentrate more so that you could finish work faster? But then again, I'm guilty of that lately. I have not been sleeping well, because it's hard to sleep frickin early and wake up at 5.43am when it's still dark.

Anyway, I'm so sleepy...

Gender

Wow, for the third time in a day? I can't believe it! This is just a short post though.


Times have changed so much, yet some people still think the old way, in terms of gender divisions. All those "man outside, woman inside" crap is now no longer applicable, especially in a bustling city like f**king Singapore.

This is especially true for the more highly educated. Yes, gender equality is good and all, but some people still can't get to terms with it. Now that there is a big gender overlap, the two sexes have almost equal earning power (yeah I know, men still earn more than women though). But they have also lost some things and retained some things. Women have lost their domesticity. With an income, they can now afford to depend on themselves for silly (I jest) stuff such as shopping and shopping. But they have also lost the need to learn how to cook and stuff like that. So why do they even need to marry anymore?!

You could say the same for men. In my little circle of friends, more men can cook than women can. And taking care of domestic stuff is easy even for men. So why the hell would I want to marry a woman for?! If I want to marry someone now, it's probably more for companionship than anything else. (And of course for kids, duh). I don't expect too much of them really. But that's just me. Gawd, I hope I don't sound MCP. But perhaps I'm one at heart. It's just that, nobody has really impressed me... In fact, I remain quite disappointed...

Damn I just wrote some pretty controversial stuff. But it's good to get it off my heart. I hope nobody gets offended.

About my experience with my core modules

Woot... I have so many things to say today that I'm blogging the second time in a day! Mezurashi eh?

So far, out of all my cores, I have taken Computing modules, Maths modules, Life Science modules, Statistics... Forget the Organic Chem module, because it's too freaking disgusting to mention... I'll have to retake that freaking disgusting module and I don't even know if I will pass the second time. Why the hell is it my core?! Anyway, I digress.

So far, I've had the most fun with Computing and Maths modules... They're interesting and the content is like brain teasers... They really make you think... And they keep you involved! +1 for engaging! (And also because I got my only A+ there)

Life Science modules are quite interesting but the exams and tests SUCK TO THE MAX. Seriously. I mean come on, it's an university for god's sake! And here they are emphasizing memory work. They claim to test your concepts, but they are just testing you on how well you remember the fine details... Which is good and all, but I hate it! I am the kind of person who will never read a book twice and you ask me to regurgitate stuff?! NO THANKS! I especially hate those kind of questions where they expect you to remember some random molecule and what it does. And some questions are only tricky because they are actually really simple but you have to read the question really carefully. And I'm such a careless person that I always get tricked. Yes I know, learning to read the question carefully is an important skill, but still, that's cheap... Doing Life Science modules is like playing games of Concentration... I prefer my brain teasers, thank you...

As for Statistics, I find it interesting. With all that probability and uncertainty, you learn to look at things from a whole new different perspective. For example, it's actually not rare to find someone with a birthday same as yours. To learn more, check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthday_problem And other eye-opening stuff. But as usual, exams suck. Haha.

I hope I can survive... I like learning stuff, but the grades get to me sometimes... And sometimes, I just want to give up. I hate studying for the sake of grades.

I love food, REALLY

So, today I almost wanted to buy Macs... On my way there, I passed by a little homey cafe and saw "Nasi Lemak (Brown Rice)" on the menu... And I was like, okay... And then I marched on to Macs... But the (Brown Rice) left its mark on my mind, and it was past three already, which means no more extra value meal promotion... Being the innately curious and healthfreak creature that I am, I made a 180 degree turn and never looked back...

The cafe was really small though. I had to squeeze my way through those tables and chairs. The auntie was very nice, very qin qie, something to be expected of such a homey establishment. There was no eggs left, so she offered to replace it with something else. So sweet! This was a great find though. Thankfully I decided to buy Macs near my home instead of at Ang Mo Kio today, if not I wouldn't have known of this place... The brown nasi lemak was quite nice. I could taste a little coconut there, but the taste of the brown rice overpowered the coconut in the end... I was damn full when I finished it. Very filling, I must say. And very unique, too. I'm a fan of nasi lemak, yet this is my first time seeing brown nasi lemak!

Speaking of food, people are always telling me to eat more. I know they mean well, but I just can't help but get irritated sometimes. Once or twice is enough, but when you hear that from everyone... Surely you'll get sick of it. EVERY year, some of my relatives comment that I have become much thinner. I remain unchanged every year, and yet they think I'm growing thinner. So I should be a skeleton by now man. I should be getting used to it, but it still irks me. It's not fair. If I won't comment that you should get thinner, why would you comment that I should get fatter? Sometimes it boggles my mind. It's not a very nice thing to comment on, but they wouldn't know because they think it's so easy to get fat. And I guess I'm guilty of thinking the same way - How the f**k do people not get thin if they want to? Just eat healthy and be active; Is it that hard?! Yeah, so we're quits alright.

Well just to let you to know, I don't intentionally starve myself! To me, telling people to eat more is like telling fat people to starve themselves! Yeah I know, what the f**k right?!! That is true, but you wouldn't realise it... Unless you were naturally thin. Anyway, I eat normally! And sometimes, I eat voraciously! Almost every morning, at 5.43am, WITHOUT FAIL, I eat a raisin bun (sometimes with milk) and rush out to school. Then I eat one normal plate of meat noodles in school for breakfast. I bet you don't even eat that much for breakfast! After that, I eat the average lunch and sometimes the average dinner at school or homemade dinner. Or sometimes, even both! In other words, I eat dinner at school then I eat homemade dinner/supper at home! And sometimes I even eat instant ramen for supper. Beat that! Granted, I don't drink soft drinks but I am liberal about my choices of foods... I will eat ice cream with glee, drink bubble tea like it's nothing and just chomp down any nice (healthy) snack in sight! Do you get it now? Screw you!

So, why am I still so skinny? There are two plausible explanations. Firstly, it was inherited. Secondly, I'm quite active. Oh actually there's a third one. Something is hiding inside my stomach and eating all my food. F**k it would be scary if that were the case! I sincerely hope that's not happening. *Prays to all the gods* Yes, I want to get fat. Yes, I know how to get fat. But no, I can't get fat. So please, you all, give me a break. I deserve at least that much. Thank you.

Cover of Sore Ga Ai Deshou (original by Mikuni Shimokawa)



One of my favourite songs, from one of my most favourite anime ever! Full Metal Panic Fumoffu!

Lyrics are from http://www.animelyrics.com/anime/fullmetalpanic/soregaaideshou.htm

Original / Romaji LyricsEnglish Translation
Tatoeba ne   namida ga koboreru hi ni ha
Sono senaka wo   hitorijime shitai kedo
Even if there are days when the tears roll down my cheeks
I want to have your back all for myself, but
Yasashisa ha tokidoki   zankoku dakara
Motomeru hodo   kotae wo miushinau
because kindness is also cruel sometimes
I lose sight of the answer the more I search for it
Ameagari no machi   niji ga mieru nara
Ima   arukidasou   nani ka ga hajimaru
If you can see the rainbow in the town after the rain
let's start walking now, something is about to begin
Kimi ga iru kara   asu ga aru kara
Hitorikiri ja ikite yukenai kara
Konna ni chikaku ni kanjiru   sore ga, ai deshou
Namida no kazu no itami wo   kimi ha shitteru kara
Sukitooru sono me no naka ni   tashika na imi wo sagashite
Egao mitsuketai
Because I have you, because I have tomorrow
because I can't live on all alone
I feel you so close by me, I guess that's love
Because you know how much pain tears can bring
I want to find a smile in your transparent eyes
as I search for a definite meaning in them
Nani mo iwanai de mo   konna kimochi ga
Kimi no mune ni tsutawareba ii no ni
Although it'd be good if these feelings found their way into your heart 
without me needing to speak a word, 
Sukoshizutsu machi ha iro wo kaeru kedo
Hora omoide ga mata hitotsu fueta
The colour of the town changes little by little but
see, our memories have again increased by one
Kimi no kotoba no hitotsu hitotsu wo
Ima ha dakishimerareru kara kitto
Futari de kasaneatte iku   sore ga, ai deshou
Dare mo shiranai   ashita ga matte iru to shite mo
Daijoubu   mou nakanai de
Kimi to te to te wo tsunaide
Aruiteku zutto
Because now I can embrace every word that you said
I'm sure that we'll come closer to each other 
I guess that's love
Even if a tomorrow that nobody knows is waiting for us
it's all right, don't cry anymore
we'll join hands
and keep walking on forever
Futo shita shunkan   tsunoru kimochi ja naku
Sukoshizutsu   sodatete iku mono da ne
Aisuru kimochi ha
It isn't something that builds up in an instant
but a feeling that grows a little at a time,
the feeling called love
Kimi ga iru kara   asu ga aru kara
Hitorikiri ja ikite yukenai kara
Konna ni chikaku ni kanjiru   sore ga, ai deshou
Namida no kazu no itami wo   kimi ha shitteru kara
Sukitooru sono me no naka ni
Tashika na imi wo sagashite   egao mitsuketai
Because I have you, because I have tomorrow
because I can't live on all alone
I feel you so close by me, I guess that's love
Because you know how much pain tears can bring
I want to find a smile in your transparent eyes
as I search for a definite meaning in them

So fast...

The semester is coming to a close and there are so many deadlines to meet. I'm not usually one to procrastinate, but sometimes I just can't take it anymore. For the first half this semester, I tried to revise everyday and finish assignments as they came out. Now I'm just floating around~

Well, at least there are no more 6 hour practicals on Thursday.

Maybe I'm just not cut out for university life.

But I don't think working life will be any better.

I need to live in the moment.

I'm not mature enough...

Lord, when will I be mature enough?
Sometimes I think I'm too friendly, and it gives people the wrong idea. But I like the way I am.

When will I be mature enough to know that I can't please everyone?
Everyone is different, and some people just don't like the way you are. I have to stop taking things personally.

I like having friends, but that doesn't mean I should try to be friends with everyone. When will I know that enough is enough?
I have a habit of intruding into other people's personal space easily, and I should know that some people don't like that.

When will I know that some people don't think the win-win way?
I should be mature enough to know that some people don't care about win-wining. Which brings us to:

How can I more effectively say things to encourage win-win?
I like to argue with people. Sometimes I come across as arrogant, when I actually respect the other person's opinion. I just want people to consider my suggestion. I don't care if they don't like my opinion, I just want them to listen. I want to inspire others, just as I want others to inspire me. How can I encourage that? A healthy exchange of ideas, if you must.

Lord, will I ever be mature enough?

Sometimes, I do wish that I could go back to the good old days, when little was expected of you. Maybe I just need to take things less seriously. I'm mainly happy-go-lucky, but I do take things too personally sometimes. You know, being an adult ain't that bad... But I'm still not one yet. And I know I will never be.

I will always be stuck in that crevice between childhood and adulthood. That thin, fine crevice... Oh poor child, you longed to be an adult, and now that you're almost one, you long to be a child...

My first FB-jack!

Woohoo! After seeing so much Facebook jacking going around, I decided to follow the crowd and do it! It wasn't as fun as I hoped, but it was still fun! I feel a bit bad doing it though. This proves I can't really do practical jokes. I have to be less sensitive! Poor KX. Hahahaha

The robot has come

 Take heed, all iPhones!

Be like water

"Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the Earth."

What is true strength?

Too many people are trying too hard to be strong, and that, my friend, will just backfire in the end. Many people's notion of strength is the ability to tolerate, to resist, to be cool. There's a limit to what a person can tolerate. We're just humans after all. Eventually, we'll just break down no matter how "strong" we are.

Bruce Lee once said, "be like water". Water can be strong, or weak. You normally take it for granted, but it can dissolve rock and tear down houses. Water can flow through tiny cracks, or fit into any container of any shape. Water can take all sorts of nonsense, but it can also dish it out. Water can be cold or hot, ice or steam. But in the end, water never loses itself. And that's what we all should aim to be.

Empty your mind, because flowing water is fresh and stagnant water is stale. How can you enlighten yourself until you remove all those "lan ideas" from your head?! (Yes that means you should disregard this blog post too, haha!) Smell the roses, feel the earth... Life's too short to be living it like a dream.

The meek are strong, because they have humility. They're strong, because they're in touch with reality. They're secure, because they don't need to be vindicated. They're at ease, because they don't have delusions of grandeur.

Water is meek. Or is it not?

Be like water.

So, what do you think true strength is?

19 October

Yesterday was such a long day! I went out at 6.30 am and got home at 11.45am!

I decided to pon my database lecture and went to eat pancakes with ***** ******. It was such a nice place! The pancakes are good! I really underestimated them though. I couldn't finish it and in fact I skipped dinner! So it's like a luner!

Then I went to sell my DVD burner to an UK guy. He's here because he met his Singaporean sweetheart in University of London and got married! How sweet! Sometimes I wonder if any Asian guys marry Caucasian girls. You see a lot of Asian girls with Caucasian guys, but what about the other way around? So far I have not witnessed anything like that...

Finally, I walked around Clementi and stoned at McDonalds until En En ended work. The shops there really remind me of Ang Mo Kio.

I had a great time singing! En En and Yangjie sing really well! As usual, I screwed up some songs. Hope their ears are still okay HAHA

After all that, I took 165 and had a really long journey home. Granted it was quite fast since there weren't many people boarding the bus, but it's still damn far. I'm pretty much used to it, but sometimes it's still quite annoying. Wo lao le.

PRATA

PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA PRATA

I LOVE PRATA!!!!!!

Ok I just had prata this morning at the Engineering Canteen. It's 50-cents a piece for goodness sake! That's so 10 years ago!

And while eating my prata happily, I heard an all too familiar voice calling my full name, and it was Liau Wansu!!! Good to see you babe! Too bad you were in a rush for your meeting!

For lunch, I had Ginseng Chicken as usual. OMG two of my favourite foods in a day. I'm in heaven. OH WAIT I HAD AVOCADO MILKSHAKE TOO!!! Oh but it wasn't up to standard today. It was bland, to say the least.

Foood foood foood I love foooood

I'll Stand By You (Cover)

I was feeling a bit sentimental so I did a cover... My pace is kinda off, LOL

I tear too easily...

Yesterday, while watching an emotional scene in Glee I teared up... On the bus... It always happens when I watch emotional scenes. Fortunately no one was looking, lol. For some reason I felt quite bad after that... So I totally plonked on my bed the moment I got home and I slept for a straight 4 hours...

I think travelling took its toll on me. I decided to be gung ho(brave) and try out some new bus routes... In the morning I took a bus to Bishan, 156 all the way to Clementi, 96 to school and then 95 to Science, lol. It took about 2 hours and I was late for class. Argh.

Then when I was going home, I did something stupid again. After buying soya bean ice cream (<3) from NUH, I took a bus to Vivo then changed to some bus which goes to Eunos. I happily stopped halfway in Whampoa and changed to 147, only to realise that I went in the wrong direction... Ending up in Little India. Seriously, I'm not racist or anything, but I felt a bit uneasy.

When I finally got home, I was drained...

This is your LIFE>>>


Wow that is just amazing. Special thanks to Master Kang for sending it to me!

Life is not a dream; Don't pass it by not knowing what has happened.

Amazing art…

Colour_by_feimo

Colour by Feimo

Just came across this deviant, and I’m just speechless… It’s beautiful!

ZzzZzz

Ate @ Breeks with Star, Jupiter and Luna yesterday. Apparently the ice cream was spiked, because we were too groggy to study after that. Even the Gong Cha didn't help. Zzzz.


In fact, the effect seems to be persistent. I experienced a sudden bout of drowsiness at English class this morning. I couldn't concentrate on the class at all. It happened for the lectures as well. So I decided to skip my 3pm lecture. Went home, plonked on the bed and ZZzzed away for 4 hours. Woah, feels good.

On hindsight, it might be because of the anti-histamine that I took. Hmm.

Happy birthday to my...

...beloved sista!

And now it's time to catch up with my webcasts. And Glee.

You can't fight it...

Wahahaha. So much for not buying a new phone. Sometimes, you just want things even though you don't need them. And being a gadget freak, this is one of them. (Ok, I'm not exactly a gadget freak, I can withstand the urge to buy gadgets most of the time. I just appreciate them a lot. Haha!) I asked my mum about this and she agreed to pay for it, so what the hell...

I was eyeing the Milestone or the Milestone XT720. In fact, I already set my eyes on a second-hand Milestone. But the buyer flied kite(i.e. no deal) on me. Oh well. So in the end I bought the XT720 at Whymobile in Far East Plaza. It lives up to its reputation. Fast, cheap and no gimmicks. It's much cheaper than contracting a plan with Starhub, even with the handset discount and all.

But you know what? The next day, I received an email replying to my WTB ad. He was willing to sell his 3 weeks old XT720 for $70 cheaper than what I bought mine for(although mine is a brand new one). FML!!!!!

Hopefully I'm able to sell my beloved Motorola Q9H. And my music player too. Or should I sell my music player? This phone can do anything man.

Stuck in my mind

OMG Better in Time is now stuck in my mind...


And btw, Leona Lewis is reallly prettyyyyyy


Omg do I sound like a fanboi?

The reason why Singapore doesn’t ban smoking outright

The reason is money. They get so much money from the taxes that it makes no financial sense to ban smoking. I know that’s not the only reason. But it’s definitely an important reason. Another reason is that they can’t just ban smoking so suddenly since so many idiots are hopelessly addicted to smoking.

I can understand the addiction and how hard it is to get rid of one. But I believe that this is one of the most harmful addictions ever. In some addictions, you mainly harm yourself(sure, you may harm others indirectly in psychological ways but I’m just focusing on the physical ways). I mean, how the hell do you avoid smoke? It’s everywhere. It’s not fair that I have to make some stupid detour or wear some stupid mask just to protect myself from smoke.

Seriously, it’s like the number of smokers have increased everywhere I go. I had to deal with smoke in the army, and now I have to deal with it outside as well? What the hell man, what the hell.

To buy a new handphone or not…

iPhones are all the rage these days. I’ve been eyeing some touchscreen phones… I browse and browse and it gets my heart so excited… There were many times when I almost gave in. But in the end, I ask myself, do I really need a new phone?

I’m using the Motorola Q9H and I really like it. My only gripe is the lack of Wi-Fi and the not too impressive battery life. That is all. It would definitely be nice to get a new phone, something like the Sony Xperia X10 Mini Pro. But do I really need it?

1st complaint – lack of Wi-Fi. It’s convenient to have, but it’s not like there’s Wi-Fi hotspots everywhere(except when in school, but then I have my laptop anyway). And if the situation really calls for it, I can always surf using 3G. Conclusion: moot.

2nd complaint – battery life. Touchscreen phones don’t have much better battery life anyway(e.g. Android phones). At least the Motorola Q lasts a day. I guess I just have to remember to charge it everyday.

So, I finally took the plunge and upgraded the OS(operating system) from Windows Mobile 6.0 to 6.1. It’s an unofficial upgrade(Motorola has kind of abandoned Singapore, so sad), and it was the Europe version, so I didn’t dare to upgrade. Now, curiosity has got the better of me. It’s like upgrading from Windows Vista to Windows 7!

The interface is still clunky in some places, but there are many great things about Windows Mobile. I love the multi-tasking and I love how customisable it is. There are millions of things that one can change. For example, I just removed the camera shutter sound!

I guess I’ll stick with the Q for now… I might just win some super nice phone in a lucky draw or something. Better yet, may it drop from the sky!

Goodbye, old pal; Will history repeat itself?

Say goodbye to my Maxtor hard drive, which has accompanied me for 6 years (in fact, Maxtor is already out of business). I finally took the plunge and bought a new 500GB hard drive. I have been putting that off for so long, trying to burn everything to DVDs when my 80GB space was filled up. But I have had enough.

Firstly, I am a frugal person. If I can live with it, I WILL live with it. I saw no need for bigger capacity.

Secondly, it was good practice to backup to DVDs anyway. This way I would not be tempted to just leave my things around in a volatile hard drive. For your information, DVDs last much longer than a hard drive.

Thirdly, even if I bought a bigger hard drive, it will be filled up quick anyway. People tend to accommodate to what they have. If I had a bigger bag, I would tend to put more things into it.

500GB vs 80GB. That’s a 6.25 factor of increase. I wonder how long it will last?

P.S. The good thing about buying a new hard drive was the reduction of the temperature. The current hard drive is about 33 degrees Celsius when working while the previous (old) one could go up to 47 degrees. That’s a big difference! Apparently, the new hard drive is a power saving model, so I can save the Earth while I’m at it. YAY ME!

What is the most interesting thing about you?

I saw that question when I entered the PC or MAC competition to get a free Windows 7 laptop. I was stunned. I have no idea how to answer that question. I do think I’ll be speechless if an interviewer asked me that.

So… What is the most interesting thing about me? What do you mean by interesting, anyway? You mean, “fascinating”, “catches attention”? I have no idea… I’m a low profile kind of guy. Maybe…I’m random and can spout out things that are miles away from the matter at hand. Is that interesting?

Maybe… I think a lot about stuff? But a lot of people do that. Is that interesting?

Maybe… The most interesting thing about me is that I’m a person…

I’ll be searching for the answer to this one…

Actually, I love Maths

I do find it pretty tedious at times but I love the way it gets me thinking hard. Sometimes, you don’t have all the time in the world and the thinking process is interrupted.

Actually, I love computing as well. I do mean that I was, and still am a big fan of it. However, I wanted to go Arts so badly. I don’t know why. Maybe I was afraid of doing my hobby as a job next time. You know what happens to hobbies which become jobs… Jobs and hobbies don’t really belong in the same sentence (see what I did there?).

GIMP 2.7.1 is out!

And the dreaded “windows flying all over” syndrome is gone! It’s been so long since I used GIMP, but I remember that I could do certain things in GIMP which I couldn’t in Photoshop Surprised smile

Furthermore GIMP is free AND open-source! Maybe one day I’ll be pro enough to contribute to GIMP development.

Download GIMP 2.7.1 BETA for Windows here

IPPT

Woohoo, gonna take IPPT! Please don't rain! I wanna get it over and done with!

Edit:
Alright, I got Silver! I almost didn't make it... When running the last 400m of the 2.4km, I almost puked... Fortunately I held it in and completed it with 7 seconds to spare :O

I was quite nervous when I was on my way. I spent so long waiting for the freaking bus 169 and I thought I was gonna be late... It's an army camp after all. In the end, everything was so relaxed lol.

Absent-minded

I'm so... absent-minded. Maybe I'm just too easily distracted. I left my practical results in the lab(at least that's what I think, maybe it's not even there LOL). Argh I feel so guilty, so irresponsible.

I've lost many things in the past as well... Many bicycles, wallet(had to pay $100 fine for the IC loss, ouch)... Sometimes I'm amazed that I go through the day without losing anything! I totally have a one-track mind... I wonder if it's something that can be changed?

Exhausted

It's been a long, long day. My brain is fried.

So, what do I want to change about myself?

I have no idea. I'm fine as it is. I'm enough right now.

I'm satisfied. Is that a bad thing?

I'll slowly improve, bit by bit. I'm satisfied with my pace of improvement.

Should I improve myself further, faster?

Or is there really a need for improvement?

Is being happy enough?

Travelling (abroad) broadens the mind?

It is not a direct causal relation. It would be more apt to say that thinking and experience broadens the mind. Many are too attracted by the glamour of flying and miss out on the local beauty. And they say there's nothing interesting here.

Of course, I can't deny that there are exponentially many things to see overseas. But there are many things here which cannot be found overseas.

Rewards, grades

Receiving a reward for doing something makes people want to do it more. However, when the reward is withdrawn, people want to do it even less than they did before receiving the reward.
Experiments with People; Revelations of Social Psychology
That is why our education system is fail. The motivation to learn is extrinsic. Granted, there are some who see through the mist and learn for the sake of learning, for the sake of curiosity, for the sake of love. But I see so many who get turned off just because of poor grades. "I hate maths and science because I suck at them". They don't see maths and science for what they are. I am disappointed when people say they hate physics. Physics is so beautiful, yet they probably hate it because they didn't do well in it.
Ask any college student. What are they studying for? I bet the answer is "grades".
I'm guilty of that too. I love the subjects I study. I love to find out more about the subject. But sometimes, it's just easier to focus on what will come out for the exam. Time is limited, after all.
How would students be assessed without grades though? I dislike the education system, but I can't really think of an alternative.