Blog of a Frog

Activation Energy and Procrastination

2012-02-05T22:13:00.000+08:00

Hello! This post is inspired by and dedicated to my buddy PCJC. He was asking how to get motivation to do your work. First of all, don't call it work. Call it an exercise, a puzzle or something that sounds more exciting. (I always believe language is important). Second, best of all, don't treat it as work. Treat it as a challenge, or something you enjoy. (Of course this depends on whether you can find the silver lining). Third, the first step is important. So is the last step. Why?

Let me explain in terms of chemical reactions.

BOOM! As the theory goes -- for reactions to occur, a hurdle, also known as the activation energy (Ea), has to be crossed first. Sometimes the amount of activation energy needed is so great that you need to put in a lot of energy to make the reaction happen.

This, my friend, is what causes procrastination. Procrastination is not a disease. It is simply a way for us to cope with stress and expectations. It is a sign that the hurdle seems too great to handle.

And that's why... you need enzymes! Enzymes lower the activation energy needed for a reaction. So, what kind of enzymes(techniques) can you use?

1. The 1 reaction way
Drink a lot of red bull and chiong your project in one day

2. The multiple reactions way
Think of your project as multiple, mini reactions (What was the cause of procrastination? Now, the big hurdle should be reduced to several humps). Start small, with one mini reaction at a time. Always stop halfway, unless you really cannot take it. Do not stop when you finish a reaction. DO NOT stop until you have reached the peak or almost reached the peak. Continue until you reach the peak, then stop. Why? So the next time you don't have to start another mini reaction. You can just roll down :) And it's easier to roll up to the next peak after you have enough momentum from rolling down.

This was inspired by the book Now Habit I borrowed from the library. The rationale is that you always stop with a question, with something to think about, so that you can continue off easily the next time.

That book also said something that seemed counter-intuitive. The Unschedule: "Instead of scheduling work you have to do, you fill in everything you want to do." Check out the link if you want to know more (you should).

Well, I have only tried it to a certain extent, and I must say that it is cool. Usually you try not to play, but now, you try not to "work"! Imagine trying not to do something! My rebellious nature rears its head here. Haha! In fact, I don't even treat it as "work" anymore.

Protein Folding and Real Life

2012-02-02T21:37:00.001+08:00

Some people ask, what's the point of learning of those science stuff in school? I say, that's up to them! Are they going to apply it, or just treat it as garbage?

I say, why not assimilate it? Why not take it in and enrich myself? Instead of being passive and trying to reject knowledge, accept it! Revel in it! If you don't like it, transform it! Make your enemy your friend! That is the highest strategy, other than running away. Be like water.

Let us talk about protein folding. To simplify things, protein start out linearly as a sequence of amino acids. When they fold, that is when they achieve their 3D shape and therefore their biological function. Now the protein may not always fold into this 3D shape so perfectly. They may drop into a local minimum somewhere and never get out of the depression. Look at figure A below.

D1, D2, D3 etc are those local minimums. Once the protein gets stuck in any of these local minimums, it may not get out without enough energy. It may never achieve its supposed shape.

Just like real life, some people don't achieve their full potential. Because they're stuck in a local minimum. And they believe they're stuck there. And they remain there, convincing themselves that they're just not good enough, that they were Born This Way.

No.

Genius is a myth. Hard work is real. Do you really think Mozart and Beethoven became pro composers because they had talent? No. They were pushed/pushed themselves, and they worked harder than anyone else. They got out of all the local minimums and got to the lowest energy state, folding properly in the end. (This is just an example. I do not propose that there is any limitation to our abilities.)

So the next time you tell yourself, "I can't do it. I'm just not smart enough." Stop. Do not insult our hard work. Before you tell yourself, "I can't do it," ask yourself, "did I really do everything in my ability?"

"Did I eat properly? Sleep properly? Ask many questions? Find many answers?"

Then you're allowed to say, "I did my best, but I can do even better."

On Work

2012-01-28T21:19:00.000+08:00

I just finished reading through the book "Making Work Work for the Highly Sensitive Person" borrowed from the Biz library, and it concluded with a very apt, very meaningful poem.

Then a ploughman said, "Speak to us of Work."
And he answered, saying:
You work that you may keep pace with the earth and the soul of the earth.
For to be idle is to become a stranger unto the seasons, and to step out of life's procession, that marches in majesty and proud submission towards the infinite.
When you work you are a flute through whose heart the whispering of the hours turns to music.
Which of you would be a reed, dumb and silent, when all else sings together in unison?
Always you have been told that work is a curse and labour a misfortune.
But I say to you that when you work you fulfil a part of earth's furthest dream, assigned to you when that dream was born,
And in keeping yourself with labour you are in truth loving life,
And to love life through labour is to be intimate with life's inmost secret.
But if you in your pain call birth an affliction and the support of the flesh a curse written upon your brow, then I answer that naught but the sweat of your brow shall wash away that which is written.
You have been told also life is darkness, and in your weariness you echo what was said by the weary.
And I say that life is indeed darkness save when there is urge,
And all urge is blind save when there is knowledge,
And all knowledge is vain save when there is work,
And all work is empty save when there is love;
And when you work with love you bind yourself to yourself, and to one another, and to God.
And what is it to work with love?
It is to weave the cloth with threads drawn from your heart, even as if your beloved were to wear that cloth.
It is to build a house with affection, even as if your beloved were to dwell in that house.
It is to sow seeds with tenderness and reap the harvest with joy, even as if your beloved were to eat the fruit.
It is to charge all things you fashion with a breath of your own spirit,
And to know that all the blessed dead are standing about you and watching.
Often have I heard you say, as if speaking in sleep, "he who works in marble, and finds the shape of his own soul in the stone, is a nobler than he who ploughs the soil.
And he who seizes the rainbow to lay it on a cloth in the likeness of man, is more than he who makes the sandals for our feet."
But I say, not in sleep but in the over-wakefulness of noontide, that the wind speaks not more sweetly to the giant oaks than to the least of all the blades of grass;
And he alone is great who turns the voice of the wind into a song made sweeter by his own loving.
Work is love made visible.
And if you cannot work with love but only with distaste, it is better that you should leave your work and sit at the gate of the temple and take alms of those who work with joy.
For if you bake bread with indifference, you bake a bitter bread that feeds but half man's hunger.
And if you grudge the crushing of the grapes, your grudge distils a poison in the wine.
And if you sing though as angels, and love not the singing, you muffle man's ears to the voices of the day and the voices of the night.

From The PROPHET, by Kahlil Gibran

Maths tutorial

2012-01-24T16:16:00.000+08:00

So I was thinking through this Maths problem this past few days -- sometimes when I was idle my mind would go through it, thinking of a way to solve the problem. I am pleased to announce that it has worked out. Solved by the most fundamental and powerful tool -- induction. How could I not see it?!

Ultimately, the sense of satisfaction is very much worth the hard thinking. But even the hard thinking is not punishing at all, as I enjoy thinking. Maths is a way of life!

Makeup

2012-01-20T20:25:00.000+08:00

Women love makeup because it makes them look better.
Men hate makeup because they are scared of traps.
(There are exceptions, of course.)
Me: I hate mascara/eyeliners but I like eye shadows.

The reason why it's important to go for lectures and tutorials

2012-01-13T19:25:00.002+08:00

There are at least three types of memory: auditory, visual, kinesthetic.

Lectures: audio and visual memory
Tutorials: kinesthetic

Self-study: usually only visual and maybe kinesthetic (if you do your own problems)

Unless your audio memory is so weak, lectures do help your auditory memory. And that is why there should be webcasts for every lecture. The main(only?) reason why webcasts are not popular among the school management is because of attendance. And that really sucks.

Gender Colors?

2012-01-10T19:42:00.000+08:00

I still find it puzzling that the female toilet (usually) has a red symbol, and the male toilet has a blue symbol. Red is such an aggressive colour, and blue a passive one. Logically speaking, if we consider the gender stereotypes, red should be a male colour and blue a female one.

http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2831/was-pink-originally-the-color-for-boys-and-blue-for-girls

The reason why I will always get an Android over iPhone

2012-01-01T20:55:00.001+08:00

What's this? A third consecutive post in a short span of a few days! I guess I'm just feeling inspired.

I'll probably never get an iPhone, because Android ftw:

1. I like control.

iTunes is gonna piss the hell out of me. I prefer to drag and drop my files, thank you.
I can change the themes, I can change the keyboard, I can change my dialer, I can change my SMS app...
Every app can talk to other apps, and they can access the same file system, unlike iOS
REAL multitasking (a double-edged sword, undoubtedly. also, who needs multitasking on a phone?)

2. I'm cheapo.
I can get the top-end Android smartphone for $300 less than iPhone. Duh???

3. I hate proprietary things
Like the iPhone charging plug and the non-removable battery

4. I like big screens
Does that need explanation?

Some things I miss on iPhone:

1. The accessories! There's so much accessories... And nice casings...

2. Using the same apps as my friends

Misc comments:

1. The restricted ecosystem can actually be good sometimes. After taking the Human-Computer Interaction class, this became very apparent to me. Less control and options can be a good thing for the UI, especially a mobile UI. As the famous(infamous?) quote goes, "With great power comes great responsibility". More control means more work for the user. e.g. When installing apps from the Market, it is important to check the permissions granted to the app. Prevention is cure, and no antivirus will beat prevention (i.e. good security).

2. Google is an advertising company. I hate ads.

3. Optimized software is important. Top-end Android phones have specs that blow the iPhone and WP7 out of the water, but the software is a bit flaky sometimes...

Mango Fried Rice

2012-01-01T20:34:00.001+08:00

I was left with a mango and a big box of butterhead lettuce, as well as some frozen shrimps, unused after making shrimp salad for Piggy's birthday. I overestimated the amount of mango needed and underestimated the amount of lettuce needed. And my mum was bugging me to just finish it up before we set off to Malaysia tomorrow. What to do? Easiest dish of all -- fried rice.

Spontaneous recipe
1 mango
2 butterhead lettuce heads
1 egg (whipped)
Some shrimps
Cooked rice
Garlic

1. Fry egg with cooking oil.
2. Add garlic and fry for a while, then add lettuce.
3. Add everything and stir-fry.

It turned out a bit soggy, because of the mango. Maybe dried mangoes would be better. I also didn't add salt/soya sauce, so it tasted a bit plain. But it's edible. 5/10!

Ever17

2011-12-30T19:48:00.003+08:00

Wow.

I just completed Ever17, an visual novel. My mind is blown after seeing the true ending. It's almost like watching a whole season of Doctor Who. I didn't expect this to be so good. To see the true ending, I had to go through the game's other 4 endings first, so it was a bit slow. In fact, I went through these endings in a marathon, because I played through the first path halfway during school and had to stop for a while. And I finally finished it today. Boy, was it good.

There are so many twists, and you get to see the story from many different perspectives. I can't say more because I don't want to spoil the story. But I must say that, it might be a bit slow at times, and it might be a pain to go through the 4 endings, but the true ending is totally worth it. And you really need to see the 4 endings to appreciate the true ending. I promise you it will blow your mind.

Let me end this post with one of the jokes said by one of the characters in the story:

A nurse named Kate was desperately in love with Robert, a doctor who worked at the same hospital.
Robert was crazy about Kate, as well.
Kate stood on the left side of the room and Robert stood on the right.
Kate slipped out of her white uniform and hung it on the closet door.
Robert stripped his uniform off in a bit of a hurry and simply dropped it on the floor.
Kate lowered her panties. Robert threw off his boxers.
Kate's body was lovely and supple and Robert was lean and muscled.
Kate put on the silk pajamas she had bought for the occasion.
Still naked, Robert turned off the light.
Standing on the left of the bed, Kate turned slowly to the right.
On the right of the bed, Robert turned easily to the left...
And they jumped into the bed, and... slept.
Oh, btw, Kate was sleeping in the night duty room, and Robert was sleeping in his room at home.

I'm highly sensitive

2011-12-19T00:07:00.001+08:00

I always knew I was more sensitive than the average person, but reading the book "The Highly Sensitive Person" by Elaine Arron, readily confirmed my thoughts. Highly sensitive people(HSP) process sensory data from the world more deeply. Usually, what is normal arousal levels to other people become overarousal for HSP. Are You Highly Sensitive? I answered "true" to all the questions there with the exception of the caffeine one. (I don't notice any effect from caffeine)

Those are the questions that resonate deeply with me:

I am easily overwhelmed by things like bright lights, strong smells,coarse fabrics,or sirens close by.
My nervous system sometimes feels so frazzled that I just have to go off by myself.
I get rattled when I have a lot to do in a short amount of time.
I am annoyed when people try to get me to do too many things at once.
I make a point to avoid violent movies and TV shows.
There are exceptions, of course. But I will always prefer comedies.
I become unpleasantly aroused when a lot is going on around me.
Being very hungry creates a strong reaction in me,disrupting my concentration or mood.
I can never sleep when I'm hungry
I notice and enjoy delicate or fine scents, tastes, sounds, works of art.
When I must compete or be observed while performing a task, I become so nervous or shaky that I do much worse than I would otherwise.
When I was a child, my parents or teachers seemed to see me as sensitive or shy.

Really, this HSP thingy explains a lot of things.

1. I hate overcrowded places. I can literally go dizzy. That's why I also hate big parties, and I secretly come out with excuses not to attend my friend's birthday parties because I probably won't be able to take it (oops).

2. Smokers and their smoke are a fucking bitch. Seriously. Does this even need explanation? Why the fuck do we have to content with smokers for fresh hair? The saying goes "better to light a candle than to curse the dark", but it's a fucking pain to go out of your way to avoid those fucking smoke? Btw, the new Serangoon MRT bus stop is a fucking good combination of overcrowding and smoking. I really fucking hate it. (So, wearing a mask is a pain; and even then the smoke seeps in the clothes making them smell; so I have to go out of my way to the bus interchange)

3. I eat really slow. I have friends who eat slower, but I'm still slow. I like to savour my food. And I really hate it when people make me rush to eat.

4. I read the ingredients of every food I buy. Okay, this is probably OCD.

5. I cry easily. I don't cry as easily now, because I have learned to hold my tears. Which is probably not healthy, but whatever.

6. I really need a lot of alone time. I enjoy interacting with people, yes, but I need a lot of alone time to recharge.

7. I'm quite sensitive to sounds. Even the mere vibration of the phone can usually wake me up. And my alarm is the Titanic song in piano form. Unless I'm in super deep sleep, which is probably never?

8. So picky about food. New stuff can really frazzle me, so I like to stick to stuff I know.

9. I really, really cannot do business. The business industry would probably freak the hell out of me. Oh, my nerves will be gone if I have to keep interacting with people all day.

10. I have always longed for the country life. Because I know city life is too arousing for me. But then country life might be too boring for me. I guess I'm easily bored, yet easily overaroused. Sad huh?

11. Sometimes I see people reading or studying while listening to music. I don't know how they can do that because it never works for me. I'll be distracted by the music (even calming songs).

12. I like to think about why? and how? and I like to improve myself. Some people don't and they go all like whyyousoweird which is of course fucking insulting to me but then they don't know it.

13. I don't know how I'm gonna survive after I graduate.

Edit: Blog of a Sheep has written a great response to this post.

Gasai Yuno is the Bomb

2011-12-16T15:52:00.001+08:00

I've only watched 4 episodes of Mirai Nikki, but I've already fallen in love with Yuno. She is super awesome. IMBAgirl. Yanderes FTW

Surfeit of Thieves

2011-12-08T23:08:00.001+08:00

Hello! This is yet another book I found in Skyrim. It's creepy, and quite funny at the same time.

Surfeit of Thieves
by Aniis Noru
How a busted robbery gets even worse

This looks interesting," said Indyk, his eyes narrowing to observe the black caravan making its way to the spires of the secluded castle. A gaudy, alien coat of arms marked each carriage, the lacquer glistening in the light of the moons. "Who do you suppose they are?"

"They're obviously well-off," smiled his partner, Heriah. "Perhaps some new Imperial Cult dedicated to the acquisition of wealth?"

"Go into town and find out what you can about the castle," said Indyk. "I'll see if I can learn anything about who these strangers are. We meet on this hill tomorrow night."

Heriah had two great skills: picking locks and picking information. By dusk of the following day, she had returned to the hill. Indyk joined her an hour later.

"The place is called Ald Olyra," she explained. "It dates back to the second era when a collection of nobles built it to protect themselves during one of the epidemics. They didn't want any of the diseased masses to get into their midst and spread the plague, so they built up quite a sophisticated security system for the time. Of course, it's mostly fallen into ruin, but I have a good idea about what kind of locks and traps might still be operational. What did you find out?"

"I wasn't nearly so successful," frowned Indyk. "No one seemed to have any idea about the group, even that that there were here. I was about to give up, but at the charterhouse, I met a monk who said that his masters were a hermetic group called the Order of St Eadnua. I talked to him for some time, this fellow name of Parathion, and it seems they're having some sort of ritual feast tonight."

"Are they wealthy?" asked Heriah impatiently.

"Embarrassingly so according to the fellow. But they're only at the castle for tonight."

"I have my picks on me," winked Heriah. "Opportunity has smiled on us."

She drew a diagram of the castle in the dirt: the main hall and kitchen were near the front gate, and the stables and secured armory were in the back. The thieves had a system that never failed. Heriah would find a way into the castle and collect as much loot as possible, while Indyk provided the distraction. He waited until his partner had scaled the wall before rapping on the gate. Perhaps this time he would be a bard, or a lost adventurer. The details were most fun to improvise.

Heriah heard Indyk talking to the woman who came to the gate, but she was too far away to hear the words exchanged. He was evidently successful: a moment later, she heard the door shut. The man had charm, she would give him that.

Only a few of the traps and locks to the armory had been set. Undoubtedly, many of the keys had been lost in time. Whatever servants had been in charge of securing the Order's treasures had brought a few new locks to affix. It took extra time to maneuver the intricate hasps and bolts of the new traps before proceeding to the old but still working systems, but Heriah found her heart beating with anticipation. Whatever lay beyond the door, she thought, must be of sufficient value to merit such protection.

When at last the door swung quietly open, the thief found her avaricious dreams paled to reality. A mountain of golden treasure, ancient relics glimmering with untapped magicka, weaponry of matchless quality, gemstones the size of her fist, row after row of strange potions, and stacks of valuable documents and scrolls. She was so enthralled by the sight, she did not hear the man behind her approach.

"You must be Lady Tressed," said the voice and she jumped.

It was a monk in a black, hooded robe, intricately woven with silver and gold threads. For a moment, she could not speak. This was the sort of encounter that Indyk loved, but she could think to do nothing but nod her head with what she hoped looked like certainty.

"I'm afraid I'm a little lost," she stammered.

"I can see that," the man laughed. "That's the armory. I'll show you the way to the dining hall. We were afraid you weren't going to arrive. The feast is nearly over."

Heriah followed the monk across the courtyard, to the double doors leading to the dining hall. A robe identical to the one he was wearing hung on a hook outside, and he handed it to her with a knowing smile. She slipped it on. She mimicked him as she lowered the hood over her head and entered the hall.

Torches illuminated the figures within around the large table. Each wore the uniform black robe that covered all features, and from the look of things, the feast was over. Empty plates, platters, and glasses filled every inch of the wood with only the faintest spots and dribbles of the food remaining. It was a breaking of a fast it seemed. For a moment, Heriah stopped to think about poor, lost Lady Tressed who had missed her opportunity for gluttony.

The only unusual item on the table was its centerpiece: a huge golden hourglass which was on its last minute's worth of sand.

Though each person looked alike, some were sleeping, some were chatting merrily to one another, and one was playing a lute. Indyk's lute, she noticed, and then noticed Indyk's ring on the man's finger. Heriah was suddenly grateful for the anonymity of the hood. Perhaps Indyk would not realize that it was she, and that she had blundered.

"Tressed," said the young man to the assembled, who turned as one to her and burst into applause.

The conscious members of the Order arose to kiss her hand, and introduce themselves.

"Nirdla."

"Suelec."

"Kyler."

The names got stranger.

"Toniop."

"Htillyts."

"Noihtarap."

She could not help laughing: "I understand. It's all backwards. Your real names are Aldrin, Celeus, Relyk, Poinot, Styllith, Parathion."

"Of course," said the young man. "Won't you have a seat?"

"Sey," giggled Heriah, getting into the spirit of the masque and taking an empty chair. "I suppose that when the hourglass runs out, the backwards names go back to normal?"

"That's correct, Tressed," said the woman next to her. "It's just one of our Order's little amusements. This castle seemed like the appropriately ironic venue for our feast, devised as it was to shun the plague victims who were, in their way, a walking dead."

Heriah felt herself light-headed from the odor of the torches, and bumped into the sleeping man next to her. He fell face forward onto the table.

"Poor Esruoc Tsrif," said a neighboring man, helping to prop the body up. "He's given us so much."

Heriah stumbled to her feet and began walking uncertainly for the front gate.

"Where are you going, Tressed?" asked one of the figures, his voice taking on an unpleasant mocking quality.

"My name isn't Tressed," she mumbled, gripping Indyk's arm. "I'm sorry, partner. We need to go."

The last crumb of sand fell in the hour glass as the man pulled back his hood. It was not Indyk. It was not even human, but a stretched grotesquerie of a man with hungry eyes and a wide mouth filled with tusk-like fangs.

Heriah fell back into the chair of the figure they called Esruoc Tsrif. His hood fell open, revealing the pallid, bloodless face of Indyk. As she began to scream, they fell on her.

In her last living moment, Heriah finally spelled "Tressed" backwards.

http://www.uesp.net/wiki/Lore:Surfeit_of_Thieves

Scorpio Man

2011-11-25T22:52:00.001+08:00

Tiffany sent me this:

SCORPIO MAN:A man with a foggy clouds over him. He is sensitive and easily hurt and always feels lonely. He does not trust anyone but himself. Sounding so negative, but he has an amazingly charisma. He is a compassionate man . He absorbs other people sentimental feeling and pain.He is a good psychiatrist and he could understand complex and confused feeling. He has a hidden power that he could use it to make things happen and do things well. He does not like people who never try to help themselves before asking other people for favors. He is the type of guy who mostly achieved his goal in life. Once he sets his mind for something, he will put all his energy and efforts in it , whether or not it is a small matter or a big project.

One of the most success man in all the Zodiac.If he is in love, you will get plenty of love from him, sometimes may be too much than you have asked for. He is serious about love and relationship and will not waste time with someone he does not love whether how pretty she is.He memorize everything well. You may say something that you already forgotten, but he will remember every words. He wants to be respected and admired and at the same time he does not like people to have power over him.When he falls in love, he really falls deep. A man in this Zodiac once in love, he will be sweeter than sugar. He does not like a plain and simple woman. A complex woman’s mind is his venture. Always be interesting and able to talk to him about every things in any subjects. He does not like a woman who sits around waiting for his call.

This is almost like reading a description of myself! It's scary.

He is sensitive and easily hurt and always feels lonely. He does not trust anyone but himself.
Sad but true. I always take things a little too personally, and read too much into things. That's why I'm trying learn to be as insensitive as possible. Getting hurt isn't awesome. Lonely? Yes... So far I've never found anyone who really understood me, but that's also because I hardly open up myself to anyone...

Once he sets his mind for something, he will put all his energy and efforts in it , whether or not it is a small matter or a big project.
TLDR: perfectionist?

He memorize everything well. You may say something that you already forgotten, but he will remember every words.
I don't know if that's true, but that has happened many times... I remember people's names and faces and what they say but of course it's only one way... I usually recognize acquaintances but I'm sick of saying hi because they don't recognize/care about me... BUT. It is hard to judge since I won't focus on the things I forget anyway. So this is very subjective.

When he falls in love, he really falls deep.
That's why I'm scared.

A Hypothetical Treachery

2011-11-17T22:50:00.001+08:00

So, as I was playing Skyrim, I came across the best tome ever. It was the best story I read in any of the tomes so far. The title is "A Hypothetical Treachery", and after reading it you would know why. I would like you to focus on the second part of the story, where Inzoliah and Malvasian do some intellectual exercises. It is the best part, and it highlights how typical mages act. The first part provides some background.

Source: Elder Scrolls V -- Skyrim; Wiki

Dramatis Personae
Malvasian: A High Elf battlemage
Inzoliah: A Dark Elf battlemage
Dolcettus: A Cyrodiil healer
Schiavas: An Argonian barbarian
A Ghost Some bandits Scene: Eldenwood

As the curtain rises, we see the misty labyrinthian landscape of the legendary Eldengrove of Valenwood. All around we hear wolves howling. A bloodied reptilian figure, SCHIAVAS, breaks through the branches of one of the trees and surveys the area.

SCHIAVAS: It's clear.

INZOLIAH, a beautiful Dark Elf mage, climbs down from the tree, helped by the barbarian. There is the sound of footsteps nearby. Schiavas readies his sword and Inzoliah prepares to cast a spell. Nothing comes out.

INZOLIAH: You're bleeding. You should have Dolcettus heal that for you.

SCHIAVAS: He's still drained from all the spells he had to cast down in the caves. I'm fine. If we get out of this and no one needs it more, I'll take the last potion of healing. Where's Malvasian?

MALVASIAN, a High Elf battlemage, and DOLCETTUS, a Cyrodiil healer, emerge from the tree, carrying a heavy chest between the two of them. They awkwardly try to get down from the tree, carrying their loot.

MALVASIAN: Here I am, though why I'm carrying the heavy load is beyond me. I always thought that the advantage of dungeon delving with a great barbarian was that he carried all the loot.

SCHIAVAS: If I carried that, my hands would be too full to fight. And tell me if I'm wrong, but not one of the three of you has enough magicka reserved to make it out of here alive. Not after you electrified and blasted all those homunculuses down below ground.

DOLCETTUS: Homunculi.

SCHIAVAS: Don't worry, I'm not going to do what you think I'm going to do.

INZOLIAH (innocently): What's that?

SCHIAVAS: Kill you all and take the Ebony Mail for myself. Admit it -- you thought I had that in mind.

DOLCETTUS: What a perfectly horrible thought. I never thought anyone, no matter how vile and degenerate --

INZOLIAH: Why not?

MALVASIAN: He needs porters, like he said. He can't carry the chest and fight off the inhabitants of Eldengrove both.

DOLCETTUS: By Stendarr, of all the mean, conniving, typically Argonian --

INZOLIAH: And why do you need me alive?

SCHIAVAS: I don't necessarily. Except that you're prettier than the other two, for a smoothskin that is. And if something comes after us, it might go for you first.

There is a noise in some bushes nearby.

SCHIAVAS: Go check that out.

INZOLIAH: It's probably a wolf. These woods are filled with them. You check it out.

SCHIAVAS: You have a choice, Inzoliah. Go and you might live. Stay here, and you definitely won't.

Inzoliah considers and then goes to the bushes.

SCHIAVAS (to Malvasian and Dolcettus): The king of Silvenar will pay good money for the Mail, and we can divide it more nicely between three than four.

INZOLIAH: You're so right.

Inzoliah suddenly levitates up to the top of the stage. A semi-transparent Ghost appears from the bush and rushes at the next person, who happens to be Schiavas. As the barbarian screams and thrashes at it with his sword, it levels blasts of whirling gas at him. He crumbles to the ground. It turns next to Dolcettus, the healer, and as the Ghost focuses its feasting chill on the hapless Dolcettus, Malvasian casts a ball of flame at it that causes it to vaporize into the misty air. Inzoliah floats back down to the ground as Malvasian examines the bodies of Dolcettus and Schiavas, who are both white-faced from the draining power of the ghost.

MALVASIAN: You had some magicka reserved after all.

INZOLIAH: So did you. Are they dead?

Malvasian takes the potion of healing from Dolcettus's pack.

MALVASIAN: Yes. Fortunately, the potion of healing wasn't broken when he fell. Well, I guess this leaves just the two of us to collect the reward.

INZOLIAH: We can't get out of this place without each other. Like it or not.

The two battlemages pick up the chest and begin plodding carefully through the undergrowth, pausing from time to time at the sound of footsteps or other eerie noises.

MALVASIAN: Let me make sure I understand. You have a little bit of magicka left, so you elected to use it to make Schiavas the ghost's target, forcing me to use most of my limited reserve to destroy the creature so I wouldn't be more powerful than you. That's first-rate thinking.

INZOLIAH: Thank you. It's only logical. Do you have enough power to cast any other spells?

MALVASIAN: Naturally. An experienced battlemage always knows a few minor but highly effective spells for just such a trial. I take it you, too, have a few tricks up your sleeve?

INZOLIAH: Of course, like you said.

They pause for a moment before continuing as a fearful wail pierces the air. When it dies away, they slowly trudge on.

INZOLIAH: Just as an intellectual exercise, I wonder what spell you would cast at me if we made it out of here without any more combat.

MALVASIAN: I hope you're not implying that I would dream of killing you so I would keep the treasure all to myself.

INZOLIAH: Of course not, nor would I do that to you. It is merely an intellectual exercise.

MALVASIAN: Well, in that case, purely as an intellectual exercise, I would probably cast a leech spell on you, to take away your life force and heal myself. After all, there are brigands on the road between here and Silvenar, and a wounded battlemage with a valuable artifact would make a tempting target. I'd hate to survive Eldengrove merely to die in the open.

INZOLIAH: That's a well-reasoned response. As for myself, again, not saying I would ever do this, but I think a simple, sudden electrical bolt would serve my purposes admirably. I agree about the danger of brigands, but don't forget, we also have a potion of healing. I could easily slay you and heal myself to full capacity.

MALVASIAN: Very true. It would end up a question then of whose spell was more effective at that instant. If our spells counteracted one another and I leeched your life energy only to be crippled by your lightning bolt, then we could both be killed. Or so near death that a mere potion of healing would scarcely help either one of us, let alone both. How ironic it would be if two scheming battlemages, not saying we are scheming but for the purpose of this intellectual exercise, were left on the brink of death, completely drained of magicka, with one healing potion to choose from. Who would get it then?

INZOLIAH: Logically, whoever drank it first, which in this case would be you since you're holding it. Now, what if one of us were injured, but not killed?

MALVASIAN: Logic would dictate that a scheming battlemage would take the potion, leaving the injured party to the mercy of the elements, I suppose.

INZOLIAH: That does seem most sensible. But suppose that the battlemages, while certainly scheming types, had a certain respect for one another. Perhaps in that case, the victorious one might, for instance, put the potion up a tree near his or her gravely wounded victim. Then when the wounded party had enough magicka replenished, he or she would be able to levitate to the tree branches and recover the potion. By that time, the victorious battlemage would have already collected the reward.

They pause for a moment at the sound of something in the bushes nearby. Carefully, they climb across the branches of a tree to bypass it.

MALVASIAN: I understand what you're saying, but it seems out of character for our hypothetic scheming battlemage to allow his or her victim to live.

INZOLIAH: Perhaps. But it's been my observation that most scheming battlemages enjoy the feeling of having bested someone in combat, and having that person alive to live with the humiliation.

MALVASIAN: These hypothetical scheming battlemages sound ... (excitedly) Daylight! Do you see it?

The two scurry across the branch dropping behind a bush, so we can no longer see them. We can, however, see the shimmering halo of sunlight.

MALVASIAN (behind the tall bush): We made it.

INZOLIAH (likewise, behind the tall bush): Indeed.

There is a sudden explosion of electrical energy and a wild howling aura of red light, and then silence. After a few moment's pause, we hear someone climbing up the tree. It is Malvasian, putting the potion high up in the bough. He chuckles as he climbs back down and the curtain drops.

Epilogue. The curtain rises on a road to Silvenar. A gang of bandits have surrounded Malvasian, who is propped up on his staff, barely able to stand. They pull his chest away from him with ease.

BANDIT #1: What have we got here? Don't you know it ain't safe to be out on the road, all sick like you are? Why don't we help you with your load?

MALVASIAN (weakly): Please ... Let me be ...

BANDIT #2: Go on, spellcaster, fight us for it!

MALVASIAN: I can't ... too weak ...

Suddenly, Inzoliah flies in, casting lightning bolts from her fingers at the bandits, who quickly scramble away. She lands on the ground and picks up the chest. Malvasian collapses, dying.

MALVASIAN: Hypothetically, what if ... a battlemage cast a spell on another which didn't harm him at once, but ... drained his life force and his magicka, bit by bit, so he wouldn't know at the time, but ... feel confident enough to leave the potion of healing behind?

INZOLIAH: A most treacherous battlemage she'd be.

MALVASIAN: And ... hypothetically ... would she be likely to help her fallen foe ... so that she could enjoy the humiliation of him continuing ... to live?

INZOLIAH: From my experience, hypothetically, no. She doesn't sound like a fool.

As Inzoliah lugs the chest off toward Silvenar, and Malvasian expires on the stage, we drop the curtain.

http://elderscrolls.wikia.com/wiki/A_Hypothetical_Treachery

Relating Algorithms Solving Techniques to Real Life

2011-11-16T11:26:00.001+08:00

Indeed, Algorithms is the most thought provoking class I have taken so far. Other than the obvious application in computer programs, we can apply algorithm techniques to our personal lives.

1. Divide and Conquer
Wonder how to get started when your problem is too big? No problemo. Divide your problem into smaller subproblems, solve them, combine the solutions and you'll have conquered the problem. This is the way to get rid of procrastination. If the problem is too big, you're hesitant to get started. So just solve a small part of the problem, first! As the Chinese proverb goes, "water can pierce through rock". No matter how big the problem is, given enough time and patience, you can solve all of the smaller problems, and hence, the big problem itself.

2. Dynamic Programming
To put it simply, in dynamic programming, you keep the results of your smaller problems, because your big problem might have many identical subproblems. In other words, once you have done something important, do not discard it, for it may be useful. E.g. every module in NUS requires some foundation. The trend is to forget the modules you studied when a next semester arrives, but that is a fallacy. Don't just forget everything. Your brain is huge enough to handle it. For example, my current module LSM3231 Protein Structure and Function requires a good foundation of basic biochemistry, and I regret that I did not study hard enough for biochemistry before.

3. Greedy Algorithms
Get your priorities right. In greedy algorithms, you always take the best choice available at the moment. I think this is quite self-explanatory, no?

4. NP-Hard Problems
Some problems are just impossible to solve efficiently.Don't just blindly delve into solving a problem; know when to stop.

Here's a nice comic to sum up this post:

This, my friend, is an example of a NP-Complete problem. You don't need to know what is NP-Complete to understand the comic. Just know that it's is damn hard to find exactly $15.05 worth of appetizers (Note: it may be easy enough for a small list, but take a big list...). If you can show that this problem can be solved quickly (i.e. P=NP), it means all of the NP-Complete problems can be solved quickly too. Also, you'll get a million dollars to boot (Millennium Prize Problems). By the way, many people have tried to prove P=NP. Here is an example of a crazy date who did that.

Lazy Generation

2011-11-09T23:43:00.001+08:00

I always want to facepalm myself when people take lifts for 2 storeys or less. Today, I witnessed someone taking the lift in SoC from level 1 to level 2. Actually, it happens quite regularly.

Sometimes, my friends really piss me off. I can understand if it's like 4 storeys or so, but 2 storeys, and going down the stairs? Please... Lifts are a waste of time and energy for that. But I think I will never understand, because I try to take the stairs whenever possible (if taking the lift isn't significantly faster). For example, when I go home, I always take 6 storeys of stairs, because it's just faster than taking the lift. I love a good work out, and I believe that exercise is good for you. But I think people are too used to taking the lazy way out and they get so used to it, they can't take even a little bit of work out. It's all a vicious cycle in the end.

Today, something my friend said really puzzled me. She said she didn't want to walk up two storeys of stairs right before the exam because it will make her forget about things. I hope she meant it as a joke because I really don't understand it. Firstly, moderate amounts of exercise doesn't make you forget things. In fact it helps you remember better. As a bio student, she should know that the brain requires oxygen, and exercise, of course, improves circulation of blood and therefore supply of oxygen to the brain. Secondly, exercise also makes you feel good due to endorphins, which makes you feel good and raises your morale. Of course, extreme exercise will probably make you forget things! But, two storeys of stairs? Come on... I was quite peeved because we were gonna be late for the exam. On hindsight, I should have just taken the stairs! God. In the end, I was late for the exam by 1 or 2 minutes. That may be little, but every minute counts to me! Gosh, seriously. Thank god I was able to finish the exam in time. F**king hell. It was an important exam to me, because Life Science exams really suck and I really need to squeeze as many marks as possible.

A Few Short Anime Reviews for Oct 2011 (Fall Season)

2011-11-05T19:56:00.000+08:00

I picked up on three series that seemed interesting.
Hunter X Hunter, Guilty Crown, and Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon.

1st of all, Hunter X Hunter was recommended by my friends. Also, it is definitely a must-watch for all shounen fans. No kidding. The characters are annoying but they are also awesome at the same time. I'm tempted to watch the old series, but I shall just stick to the new one. Btw, even though I don't like metal, the ending theme is f**king awesome.

2nd, Guilty Crown. I love sci-fi shows. But that is not the reason you must watch this show. The reason is Inori.

Oh my angel!!!!

You want to give it to me? <3

Damn you, lucky Shu.

It's the overused "transfer student" crap.

Whose hand is that?

...

What? Pretty girl is living with me? I so did not expect that.

Good, because that's for MY EYES only.

I'll give you anything!!!!!

AWWWWW~ <3

Are you gonna shoot my friend?!

Come on!

INORI!!!!! Help me!

Did I mention how awesome the ending is? And it seems to change with every episode! PLUS IT'S ***KING SUPERCELL! And of course we end with awesome Inori art.

I hope the tribute to Inori did not scare you away (Well you're still reading, right?). Anyways, let's continue.
3rd, Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon. Yep, it is another sci-fi show. I am a sucker for sci-fi settings in anime, regardless of whether it sucks or not. First thing to note: If you love boobs, watch this anime. The girls have ridiculously big boobs. (And also ridiculously small boobs. Talk about no boobs at all, literally. One of them got em... removed)

That aside, this anime is just plain confusing. The writers throw so many characters and so much background information on you in the first few episodes, it ain't even funny. I've lost track of the different places the anime moved to. And most of all, the main hero is gonna confess to a girl who died 10 years ago. Also, the world is gonna end. What?!

Regardless, I think I've reached the hook point at about the 4th episode. There is just a mystery so mysterious that it begs me to watch the rest of the series.. Plus, boobs. Plus, sci-fi. Plus, cool character designs. Plus, the main hero's face makes me want to punch him. Ijou.

Mind over Matter

2011-11-01T19:40:00.002+08:00

I think I'm too anal about language use sometimes. I also think I'm too much of a busybody. For example, when people say that it's "too hard for me" or things like that, I get a little pissed off. I know it's just a figure of speech, but I can't help but feel that it will encourage a defeatist attitude. I mean, language is kind of inseparable from our thinking. I would rather "too hard for me" be reframed into "I have not tried to understand it yet" or "I need more effort to understand it". "Oh come on, it's just a little thing", you say. I agree that it's a little thing but day by day it adds up and the scary thing is, you don't even know it. If you keep telling yourself "it's too hard for me" for 365 days every year, it's like trying to row against the current. Well, that is what I think anyway. It may not be correct, and I probably nitpick too much. But still...

Anyways, I realised morale is super important as well. As evidenced by our IFG volleyball games. Our morale was up the whole time and nothing could put us down. So here are some inspiring proverbs that I chanced upon today.

“Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.” - Chinese Proverb

I chanced upon this while I was watching Parks and Recreation. Well, I think this is quite a strong version of the proverb. "Refusing" is a strong word, methinks.

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. -Chinese Proverb

I think this quote is very very awesome. Yes, it is just another version of "appreciate what you have". But it is put across very beautifully. Walking on the Earth... We take it so much for granted.

7 modules

2011-10-22T19:48:00.003+08:00

I think 7 modules is my upper limit. It is a pain. I have to be constantly on alert and I have to consistently finish my assignments/tutorials way before the deadline else they WILL pile up. For example, I just finished the first draft(actually more like third draft) of my presentation due on 5th Nov. I have also finished an assignment due on 3rd Nov (coincidentally my birthday). I also finished my coding assignment for Computer Graphics due on 29th Oct.

Now, I have to finish my tutorial which is to take place on Tuesday instead of Wednesday (public holiday). This is because I have a 6 hours (probably 7 or more actually) practical on Monday. So I'll be having lessons from at least 10am to 6pm. I'll probably be too tired to do my tutorial after I reach home so late at night.

Seriously, there's so many public holidays this semester. It's crazy. They should let make-up classes be E-learningfied instead.

The longest increasing subsequence problem

2011-10-17T01:19:00.004+08:00

The problem is defined as follows: given a sequence, we want to find a longest subsequence that is sorted in increasing order.

I've spent some time searching for answers using dynamic programming (a question in my tutorial sparked this), yet I had difficulty finding clear explanations of algorithms listed to solve this particular problem.

I saw the light mostly after reading http://www.algorithmist.com/index.php/Longest_Increasing_Subsequence, so my explanation will be based on that.

1. An obvious solution using the Longest Common Subsequence(LCS) algorithm.
i) Create a copy of A, B and sort it.
ii) Compare A and B using the LCS algorithm.
A longest subsequence of "A" that is sorted must also be part of "B", since sorting A to become B doesn't change the order of that longest subsequence. The longest common subsequence of A and B must also be the longest subsequence that is sorted in A. Suppose, for sake of contradiction, that it's not, then we can add on an element larger than the biggest element in that sequence or smaller than the smallest element in that sequence, and it will be a subsequence that is sorted and common to both A and B, and yet be larger than the longest common subsequence we have found. A contradiction.

2. Making use of recurrence.
q(k) = max(q(j) for 1<= j <=k-1) + 1
where q(k) is the length of the longest increasing subsequence in sequence S of length k.

Basically what this means that we have already found increasing subsequences before k, and now, if S[k] is larger than the largest element in the longest increasing subsequence we have found so far, we can add S[k] to that subsequence and thus increase the length.

3. A O(n lg n) algorithm was provided, but I didn't quite understand it until I saw the C++ code, also provided, and stared very hard at a Wikipedia article. Basically, we create a B which contains the current longest increasing subsequence(LIS) and slowly build on that in every iteration. Note that B is sorted, since it contains the current LIS. Now, we consider the next element, A[i] to add to B. Is A[i] bigger than the largest element in B? If yes, we can just extend B with A[i]. If not, it must be smaller than the largest element in B. So we can just replace an element in B with A[i]. (It is beneficial to replace some element bigger in B with something smaller that retains the sorted order, since this opens up more possibilities for the rest of the iteration.) It doesn't matter that we replace it because we just need to find the length of the LIS. So we can just build on a previous subsequence. If this grows to be bigger than the previous subsequence that we were building, then good! In the end, we will find the length of the longest common subsequence.

It is trivial to get the longest common subsequence instead of just the length. We can use a tracking table to store the predecessors of each element that we add on to a subsequence. I'll leave it up to you as an exercise.

P.S. To be updated with clearer explanations and maybe(?) pictures if I have the time.

Other interesting readings:
Patience sorting game related to longest increasing subsequence

Hiding cables in plain sight

2011-10-02T16:26:00.000+08:00

After getting fibre broadband, I've decided that wireless no longer meets my needs. In fact, I had wanted to use an Ethernet cable to link the router to my computer for a very long time, but it was impractical because: 1. I can't just lay the cable on the floor because that would cut my living room in half; 2. I'll have to drill a hole in the wall so that the cable can go into my room. This time I finally decided enough is enough. I got some flat Buffalo Cat5e cable from Cospro at Sim Lim Square (flat so that I can just pass it under my door and not drill any holes)But the cable sprawled across the top of the living room and was unsightly. I was inspired by an old post at Lifehacker.

So I got to work. I first made some origami leaves

thanks to this awesome tutorial at Bloomize. Some link to origami roses from that post caught my eye, so I decided to make some roses too. At first, I wanted to do the Kawasaki Rose, but a quick glance at the instructions told me that it was too complicated (although it looks damn fking nice). So I followed this video instead.

I half-followed the video, and I really anyhow folded without regard for the instructions, and it turned out quite nice. In fact I think it looks much better than the yellow rose that I folded following the instructions completely. Go figure.

Next up I wanted to make some perching bird, and at first I made a bird of paradise which was super cool-looking but too small for my purposes (I wanted to hide the masking tape). So I found some nesting crane at Origami Club which is basically just a variation of the normal crane.

It took quite some time, but I'm quite pleased with the results. (I was supposed to study my computer graphics...)

Origami leaf with or without veins

2011-10-02T12:47:00.000+08:00

This is awesome... I'm making this to hide my wires.

Origami leaf with or without veins

Notebooks

2011-09-28T19:31:00.002+08:00

I once read somewhere that you should carry a notebook wherever you go. Have a notebook by your side while you're sleeping, so that you can jot down ideas from your dreams. Since then, I've always carried a notebook whenever it's practical to do so (for occasions where I don't bring my bag, I use my phone as a replacement). To be honest, some things I just jot down and forget about it. Because I always scribble on the next clean page available, so my notebook isn't that organised. But I think it really helps in scrutinising my thoughts (especially for things I have to visualise and Maths-related stuff hahahaha).

Opening my LG T-280

2011-09-15T23:21:00.001+08:00

This is my first time opening a laptop. I have opened and closed my desktops millions of times, but this is my first time opening a laptop. I only wanted to change the hard disk to a brand new spanking SSD.

First try: fail. There was no mention of how to open up the laptop in the user's manual, but that is to be expected, I guess. Why would a company teach the user to open up the laptop and screw things up? So I went by intuition. I took off all the screws I could see and then tried to pry the casing open. It was tough, but I kept on trying even though I was thinking, "it can't be that tough to remove". So I wasted much time trying to figure out how the hell you get this thing open.

In the end, I did another search. I found a listing at the FCC which has internal pictures of the laptop. Peeeerfectt. From those pictures, I deduced that the keyboard has to be removed first since there were other screws beneath it that secured the case. No wonder I couldn't pry open the damn shit. Omg. Now, how the hell do you remove the keyboard? I had no idea. So I went to search and found many Youtube videos. Finally, the video showing how to replace an Acer Aspire 10.1 keyboard seemed to be similar to my laptop. But I need something thin to pry the keyboard open. Searching all my tools, I finally found one amongst the hard drive tools. Blah blah blah. I was so scared. But I managed to change the hard disk in the end. Assembling was a pain too. There was so many damn screws and damn holes that I forgot where to screw them back. I had to refer to the FCC pictures again. FML.

I almost didn't break anything. One small plastic part broke, but hopefully it doesn't affect anything. *Crosses fingers*. But it was satisfying. The new SSD is awesome. It's a Crucial m4 64GB. The capacity is really low, but I should be able to live with it.

Spending too much time on my programming assignment

2011-09-12T20:42:00.002+08:00

Even though the assignment is like only 2%.Computer graphics is too fun.The good thing is that I get to learn C++ on the spot as well, so it's quite worth it.

Maths is awesome

2011-08-18T22:29:00.000+08:00

So I thought I wouldn't be doing Maths this semester but hiding inside the CS modules that I'm taking is Maths. Woohoo! I love Maths although I'm very careless and usually don't do so well for Maths. Solving a problem is awesome. Seeing the brilliant answers of others is also awesome. I just saw one brilliant answer to a question I've been trying to find an answer to.

http://stackoverflow.com/questions/2095395/is-logn-nlogn

Yeah, I'm totally cheating :3

(Sometimes, I get stuck for too long. I would love to find out the answer for myself, but city life is too rushed...)

Circle Line Stages 4 & 5 Open on 8 Oct

2011-08-07T22:22:00.001+08:00

Rejoice! The long-awaited Kent Ridge MRT station is gonna open in 2 months time. Unfortunately, I don't think it's gonna save me that much time this semester, seeing as I'm gonna be in Computing most of the time.

Taking the shortest route:
Bus (Home to Serangoon): 12mins
Train (Serangoon to Kent Ridge): 32mins
Bus (Kent Ridge to Computing): 7mins
Total: 51mins

Now if I just take buses:
Bus 74 (Home to Bukit Timah): 38mins
Bus 151 (Bukit Timah to Computing): 29mins
Total: 57mins

Now, if I go to Science (next semester)

Bus (Home to Serangoon): 12mins

Train (Serangoon to Kent Ridge): 32mins

Walk to Science: 5mins

Total: 49mins

What about buses?

Bus 165 (Home to Holland Village): 50mins

Bus 95 (Holland V to Science): 20mins

Total: 70mins

In the end, taking buses will probably be more value for money mainly because of the concession. But taking trains is a breath of fresh air, I guess? We'll see.

5 Years of Cutting My Own Hair

2011-07-21T20:22:00.000+08:00

It all really started when I got tired of going to a barber to cut my hair every month during army days. Well, I did dabble a bit in hair cutting during my JC days, but this time I went to "Japan @ Home" to get a real shaver. It was tough at first, considering that I had to use two mirrors so that I could trim my back as well. But it got easier, and in no time I was shaving my poor hair like a pro.

Until the shaver battery died out. I could use the AC power and all, but it was inconvenient. I could even buy a new shaver, but I just decided, "screw it", and use the plain old scissors to do the job. I do screw up a bit from time to time, but it's not that easy to screw up a medium long hairstyle. Although cutting the back is always a problem. But it's fun. And satisfying.

666 Posts

2011-07-10T03:06:00.007+08:00

Numbers. I don't know why we attach so much meaning to numbers. Take 4D for example. Each number has a equal probability of showing up. Yet we're obsessed with certain numbers. Go figure.

Rose by =Clap-san

2011-07-10T03:05:00.003+08:00

I love water colours.

osu! — rhythm is just a click away

2011-07-05T22:49:00.004+08:00

I've been playing osu! a lot. I love such rhythm games. The great thing about this game is its vast array of songs. They're mostly songs from Japanese anime and games, which is utterly awesome for an anime fan like me. To play, you just have to click on the circles in time. There are sliders too. It's ridiculously addictive. The online features really keep me playing too. There's multiplayer too, and you can do co-op. There's even Taiko and Catch the Fruits mode. The mind-blowing thing is that it's all coded with .NET. I'm impressed with what you can do with .NET. Awesome.

A side effect I encountered is that I would check out the anime of songs I never heard before but played through osu! and liked it.

osu! download link

Doctor Who — Weeping Angel Arc

2011-06-28T05:43:00.001+08:00

Quite possibly the scariest arc I've ever seen on TV. The Doctor is called upon by a mysterious woman to chase a ship that crashes on some planet. On that ship is a Weeping Angel, a malevolent product of evolution. An even scarier thing is that an image of an Angel is the Angel itself. It gets really scary when the recording of the Angel comes alive and traps Amy in the ship. The horrifying face of the angel didn't help either.

The Doctor and some clerics head into a catacombs full of... statues! The best place for a Weeping Angel to hide. A Weeping Angel looks like a statue and it can't move when you're looking at it. That's its main weakness. The scary thing is... I can't be saying it because it's a spoiler. But yeah, I was really terrified.

This is gonna be a spoiler too but I have to say it... It was quite funny when Amy started counting down (she looked into the eyes of the angel for too long — a dangerous thing because eyes are doors to the soul; you never know what could enter). It's like the petrify spell seen in RPGs. 10..9..8...turned to stone! Hahaha. Very apt, I must say.

Explosions in the Sky

2011-06-22T20:52:00.000+08:00

Explosions in the Sky T-shirt by collisiontheory from Design By Humans

Yep, the nicest shirts are always on dark colours. Which is bad in Singe-apore weather.

I really love images of space and surreal stuff!

Electric water by ~Laumoon on deviantART

2011-06-17T18:42:00.000+08:00

Electric water by ~Laumoon on deviantART

Being suspended in water is like free falling in slow motion. This photo captures that feeling very well.

How much time do you spend on being interesting?

2011-06-12T02:16:00.001+08:00

People spend a huge amount of time, trouble, care, worry and money on becoming or remaining beautiful. How much time do they spend on becoming interesting? -Edward de Bono

As I was wandering in Kinokuniya waiting for my everlate friends, I flipped open this book by de Bono and its introduction immediately grabbed me. I find it quite meaningful. Even with people getting more educated, you can't deny that people are still obsessed with beauty. Of course beauty is important, but what is outer beauty without a solid core? Just an empty shell.

There was much more to be read but I didn't get the book because it was expensive. It seems like an interesting read. I shall get it another time.

One Smart Cookie

2011-06-12T01:57:00.000+08:00

Really one smart cookie.

There Can Only Be One

2011-06-10T17:29:00.000+08:00

"There Can Be Only One" submission from Threadless.

Narwhal wins xD

The Low-Fat Conspiracy

2011-06-08T15:27:00.007+08:00

Low-fat products may not be as healthy as you think, especially when they contain large amounts of sugar. Sugar is the true enemy. Especially sugar in processed foods that lack fibre. Without fibre, you don't feel as full after eating and you tend to eat more. Moreover, sugar is addictive and we tend to develop a dependency on them. This is why people love pastries and cakes and sweets. If you look at how they're made, you'll find an alarming amount of sugar in them.

Fat isn't all bad. There are many different kind of fats. There are two kind of fats that are compulsory in our diet — omega-3 and omega-6. And we need a 1:1 ratio of them (a trait inherited from the hunter-gatherer days). But the modern diet contains much more omega-6 oils/precursors than omega-3 oils/precursors, leading to a skewed ratio. Examples of omega-6 rich foods include corn, olive, chicken, and beef. Examples of omega-3 rich foods include fatty fishes like cod and salmon and greens such as spinach and broccoli.

A high-carb, low-fat diet doesn't really work to reduce weight. In fact low-carb, high fat diets or even low-carb, high-protein diets (Atkins) are more effective. But I think we should just eat in moderation. And try to eat unprocessed foods.

P.S. It is better to eat your salads or greens with some oil because they help you absorb some of the nutrients in those food.

Who's the arrogant one?

2011-06-06T18:25:00.000+08:00

A Christian guy called me arrogant.
He called me arrogant because I’m an outspoken atheist who doesn’t believe in Christianity.

He didn’t say I’m arrogant because I don’t believe in Islam, Hinduism, Buddhism, Diasporic, Sikhism, Juche, Spiritism, Judaism, Baha’i, Jainism, Shinto, Cao Dai, Zoroastrianism, Tenrikyo, Neo-Paganism, Unitarian-Universalism, Rastafarianism, or Scientology.

He said I’m arrogant because I don’t believe in the religion he has chosen.
Who’s the arrogant one here?

(via Dan Walsh)

Some of my favourite foods

2011-06-06T17:31:00.001+08:00

I’m very picky when it comes to food, so I have my favourites. I’m always puzzled when I ask people what’s their favourite food and they say they don’t have one.

Favourite fruit: Mango

I seldom eat mangoes, but it remains my favourite food. Weird huh? You would think that you’ll eat your favourite food more often. Maybe because it’s damn troublesome to eat (unless it’s pre-sliced). I love the slight bitterness and tangy taste. And it can be real sweet at times.

Favourite meat: Chicken/Fish

I used to love fish a lot, but I’ve lost my taste for it recently. It’s still one of my favourite meats though. And chicken… Well, it’s such a versatile meat. Fried chicken is just one of the best inventions ever.

Favourite curry: Chicken

I hate fish curry. I don’t know why. Chicken curry is so fragrant. Mutton curry is awesome for roti prata though.

Favourite beverage: Iced peach tea

Addicted to it. I hate carbonated drinks. They make my stomach cry.

Favourite ice cream: Green tea

Until they make a peach tea ice cream, green tea ice cream will remain my #1 favourite ice cream flavour. I really love the Haagen Dazs one, but they are damn expensive in Singapore. I used to buy tubs of them when they were on sale in Fairprice, but prices have risen since then. Soya bean ice cream (Mr Bean) is awesome too, but it can’t beat green tea.

Favourite hawker centre dessert: Red tea longan

Must have been cultivated from army days, where we would always buy this delicious dessert from Changi Village near our camp. Red tea pudding with longans plus condensed milk. I must say the milk really seals the deal. Yummy.

Favourite snack: Fruits

There is just no contest. Potato chips nor sweets do not interest me.

Favourite pizza: Hawaiian

It’s probably everyone’s favourite. I try other toppings, but I always gravitate back to Hawaiian. I wonder why.

A meh sem

2011-05-30T11:19:00.001+08:00

I finally cleared organic chemistry with a C+, which is a bit disappointing since I got all As for my lab reports and got average for the mid-terms. I must have screwed up the finals. Well, at least I cleared it, and I won't have to see any organic chemistry nonsense anymore.

As for PC1432, I got a B+, which is kind of surprising considering how hard everyone says the module is. And there was a question: "draw the components of a laser". WTF. Everyone did abysmally for the mid-terms - the average was 8/20. Thank god for an easy final, which probably saved my ass.

And I got A- for my writing module WP2201D. I expected around a B to A, so this is quite good. I really loved that module, and I learned a lot from it. Thanks Dr Brown. This module is supposed to replace my core module, and I hope they keep their end of the bargain.

I didn't expect much for the SS module, but I did wish for a B at least. Sorry, can't do memorization. I do have a good memory, but I just don't do well for essay exams. Well, B- isn't too shabby, but it's at the boundary of "S/U or not", which is a really a pain.

B+ for both CS2100 and CS2103, which is fine by me.

I have a rather good choice of modules this sem. Taking 6 modules was like taking 5 modules. Maybe I should have worked harder... But it's over. I hope for a better next sem.

I'm all over bubble tea

2011-05-23T14:47:00.000+08:00

(1) Low value for money. Premium pricing. A big bottle of Pokka Peach Tea brings me infinitely more enjoyment than a cup of bubble tea. (Although anything is overpriced compared to tap water)

(2) Earth killer. Excessive packaging. Plastics - cup, seal, fat straw. Electricity used to seal the cup.

(3) Tea bags smell good.

At Least It Was Here

2011-04-28T23:37:00.000+08:00

By the 88 and featured on "Community" (which is one of the best sitcoms I've ever seen - great writing, great references, great acting)

Give me your hands
Show me the door
I cannot stand
To wait anymore
Somebody said
Be what you be
We can be old and cold and dead on the scene
But I love you more than words can say
I can't count the reasons I should stay

Give me some more
Time in a dream
Give me the hope
To run out of steam
Somebody said
It could be here
We could be roped up, tied up
Dead in a year
I can't count the reasons I should stay
One by one they all just fade away

I'm tired of the wait and see's
I'm tired of that part of me
That makes up a perfect lie
To keep us busy
But hours turn into days
So watch what you throw away
And be here to recognize
There's another way

Give me some more
Time in a dream
Give me the hope
To run out of steam
Somebody said
It could be here
We could be roped up, tied up
Dead in a year
Oh I love you more than words can say
I can't count the reasons I should stay
One by one they all just fade away
Oh I love you more than words can say

Facing my nemesis tomorrow

2011-04-22T20:02:00.000+08:00

Oh, organic chemistry
You're such a mystery
I can't figure you out
Really wanna give you a clout

Hopefully, just hopefully,
I'll understand you colourfully
And make sure I never see you again
Because I really have nothing to gain

PLEASE LET ME PASS YOU TOMORROW!

My favourite instant noodles

2011-04-17T18:42:00.001+08:00

KOKA Laksa Singapura Flavour!

Source: http://www.punkednoodle.com/index.php/2010/03/15/noodle-1-kokas-laksa-noodle/

The magical food for all college students: instant noodles!

And the best instant noodles I've ever tried: Laksa Singapura!

Why: it's mainly because of the coconut powder, which adds a richness rarely found in other instant noodles. And the spiciness is shiok!

Cons: It might have the healthier choice label, it might be low-fat, it might be NO MSG, but it's still instant noodles! NO MSG is true, but there's still flavour enhancers such as sodium 5'-ribonucleotide. BUT WHO CARES! :P

University Education

2011-04-15T14:24:00.000+08:00

I think some people have misconceptions about university education. Its main goal is to teach you how to think, not how to do (of course there are certain exceptions like medicine and dentistry). You learn to be more rigorous in your thinking, and you learn to accept more possibilities. So if you have not matured in your thinking, it is quite a waste of your time.

Full marks!

2011-04-10T16:04:00.000+08:00

This is why I love Computing modules. Full marks for my CS2100 term test! Also, I got my marks today, when the test was just yesterday. Aaron Tan is a godlike mark-er!

Familiarity breeds liking

2011-03-31T17:44:00.000+08:00

Apparently, the more often you see someone, the more you'll like them. But I guess it makes sense. After all, most of us are more comfortable with people we know. (Yes, there might be people who like strangers more? Babies in fact. I read in a study that some babies actually prefer to be with strangers than their own mothers. Queer, right?)

This applies to other stuff as well. Like music. You tend to prefer songs that you've heard before. You tend to eat food that you know you'll like. You tend to go out with friends that you know well.

Mobilisation

2011-03-20T00:50:00.001+08:00

Dammit. Mobilisation on a Saturday afternoon. I had to go all the way back to camp... and do nothing. It's been a long time since I've been back. Nothing much has changed, really. And I wasn't able to see my dogs. Carrie passed away, and Bobby was adopted. To think I was looking forward to seeing my cute little Bobby :'(

Tomorrow I have to go back to school for some project review. Seriously. What. The. Hell. Weekend gone, just like that. Poof! And I was looking forward to my Dragon Age 2. I've been putting that off for Radiant Historia, which is a super awesome game.

What a busy week. But everything will come to an end soon. I don't know if I should be looking forward to next week. Every week is a blank piece of paper. I hope to create wonderful history.

Thunder_Bird... aka the best. shirt. EVER.

2011-03-06T20:59:00.000+08:00

http://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/detail/7943

I really really really really love this shirt.

But it's sold out :(

Hope they reprint it sometime.

I would buy it in a heartbeat!

I spy I spy... a toy car?!

2011-03-06T20:52:00.000+08:00

This was taken early in the morning on a very fine 3rd of March. This car caught my attention. If you enlarge it you would see a "SWAT" on the roof of the car. It seriously looks like a toy car.

If I had a car, it would totally be something like that.

Because if I parked it in a big multi-storey carpark I wouldn't remember where I parked it. This would totally make it easier for me to find.

The power of 20 minutes

2011-03-02T21:19:00.000+08:00

I first learned this from "The Vigorous Mind" by Ingrid E. Cummings, one of the few books that I ever bought. It's about Kaizen, a Japanese word that roughly means "continuous improvement".

Anyway, it's about how many little portions of time can add up. Do you ever think that you need a lot of time for something like learning a skill (such as learning the piano) and that you don't have it? Well, just take 20 minutes (or any arbitrary amount of time) a day. You mustn't think that it's too short a time to really learn something. After all, the little things do add up. 20 minutes a day, and in one year, you'll get a grand total of about 122 hours! And perhaps, the sum of the pieces would be greater than its whole.

As the Chinese saying goes, water can pierce rock given enough time. Just do a little every day, and you'll do more than you can ever imagine.

P.S. Although it's weird that it's much more satisfying to play an RPG for extended periods of time rather than many little sittings...

Computing day

2011-02-28T15:57:00.000+08:00

Woohoo! It's Computing day! The only real day where I'm at my own faculty... For three hours of lessons! Ain't that cool?

Seriously... My faculty is really a melting pot of cultures. A moment I hear Vietnamese, some China Mandarin the next, then Tamil. It does irk me when I hear foreign languages... No point hiding the fact that I mind. It's crappy when you don't understand what others are talking about.

Meow

2011-02-27T20:29:00.001+08:00

I seriously didn't know there existed a NUS cat community
http://blog.nus.edu.sg/nuscatcafe/our-campus-cats/science-cats/

What do you use?

2011-02-25T02:27:00.003+08:00

Got the idea from http://ailelie.dreamwidth.org/180928.html

OS: Windows 7 Home Premium 64-bit
Browser: Chrome; Firefox 4 beta on Laptop
Mail client(wow, who uses one these days?): Thunderbird
RSS: Google Reader
Antivirus Software: Microsoft Security Live Essentials
Video Player: Media Player Classic Home Cinema, after my favourite SMPlayer broke
Audio Player: SMPlayer/Music Bee
Music Library: Music Bee
Podcast Grabber: -
Writing Program: Notepad2, Word 2010
Note Taking: CintaNotes (this is awesome)
Photo Editing: Photoshop CS5
Drawing/Graphic Design/etc: Photoshop CS5, Paint.NET, Inkscape
Image Viewer: IrfanView
Video Editing: -
Video Transcoder: Handbrake/Mediacoder x64
Audio Editing: Audacity
Reading comics/zines/etc: All Mangas Reader/PDF-XChange Viewer
Photo organization/storage: Facebook? Lol.
File compression: WinRAR
File synchronization: FreeFileSync (another awesome program)
File comparison: WinMerge
Chat Client: Trillian/Windows Live Messenger 2011
IRC Client: kvIRC
Torrent Client: uTorrent
Search Website: Google
Programming language: Java, PHP
Most played game: League of Legends
Where is your taskbar? Left side of my screen

Procrastination and Perfectionism

2011-02-23T02:07:00.000+08:00

So I'm supposed to do this essay, but three days have gone by and I have no inspiration. I do have a love-hate relationship with writing. I love writing nonsense, but when it comes to the real stuff, all I have is fluff :3

I've done some stuff to prepare for my mid-term exams, but I feel that it isn't enough. How much is ever enough? I always think about how much I can do and suddenly I feel overwhelmed; It is impossible to be perfect.

There was a time when I wanted everything to be perfect; But now I couldn't care less.

Sometimes I wonder where my passion has gone. It's like I have nothing to live for anymore. Maybe it's a sign of depression.

Hakufuku

2011-02-16T22:26:00.003+08:00

From some Bleach wiki

"Yeah, no! Hakufuku was the only spell that was mentioned and that's it! So all things that happened, reiatsu concealment and her being knocked unconsciousness everything, must be attributed to Hakufuku. There is no evidence to suggest Hakufuku can't conceal reiatsu. Nothing in the manga, databook or anything contradicts that reading of events. Saying "Hakufuku or another ability" implies that another ability might have been involved. We can't do that. We have to take the option dictated by Occam's razor. We know Rangiku was knocked unconscious. We know that Aizen couldn't dictate Rangiku's reiatsu. When Rangiku woke-up she only commented on the Hakufuku spell being cast on her. Therefore, the simplest explanation is that Hakufuku did both. Going a little meta, Kubo never said Hakufuku did not conceal reiatsu. Therefore, there is no reason to suppose he didn't extend the definition of that particular kido to include reiatsu concealment. He can extend spell abilities, or rather, he can reveal more about spells that are his invention. So unless something that can be cited that says Hakufuku can only knock a Shinigami unconscious, then as of chapter 416, Hakufuku has been shown to both knock a target unconscious and hide their reiatsu. Closing discussion as I can't imagine what is left unsaid on this topic. Tinni (Talk) 02:44, September 19, 2010 (UTC)"

I just totally liked the way he/she wrote. It's so... systematic <3?

Quick and Dirty Guide to Theming the Android Phone

2011-02-16T00:12:00.000+08:00

adb pull framework-res.apk from phone.

Unpack it using apktool.

Modify whatever you want (you can port themes over by replacing files in drawable-hdpi or drawable-mdpi etc.) You can change colours by modifying the xml files in the layout folder. This might be a bit complicated, but you should be able to figure it out.

Repack it using apktool.

Now, you can just replace the framework-res.apk on your phone with your framework-res.apk. I haven't tried it yet, but adb push framework-res.apk should work.

Remember to backup all files/nandroid.

(To make a Metamorph theme - just extract the framework-res and include the files you modified into a Metamorph theme folder; you can use some existing Metamorph theme as a template)

Week from Hell

2011-02-10T21:57:00.002+08:00

Just got home. This is really a week from hell. God bless me.

Sapped

2011-02-08T21:18:00.001+08:00

It's been tiring... Too many assignments, too many projects, too much homework...

Anyway, today I finally caved in and bought some sweets. The cherry flavoured Fisherman's Friend looked enticing so I bought it. I have never bought any Fisherman's Friend in my life. There's a reason for that. But anyway, I looked at the ingredients and thought they were okay. It tasted great.

When I got home, I took a look at it again and I realised that it contained Acesulfame K. I had a nagging feeling ever since I bought it so I went to check it out and lo and behold, that substance contains a suspected carcinogen. FML.

Cut-off Jeans!

2011-01-20T23:58:00.002+08:00

I was tired of searching for short shorts. Especially denim ones. I could wear female ones, but they were too short. And it's kind of perverse too. So I brought life to my super old super long super abandoned jeans I bought once upon a time at 77th street. I believe it was during secondary school. But I digress.

I found this nice tutorial @ http://byov.blogspot.com/2010/05/how-to-cuffedrolled-shorts.html

However, I kind of anyhow sewed. At first, I had no idea how to do the hidden whip-stitch or whatever you call it. So there was these fugly threads running around the hem. Until I flipped to the other side and started sewing again. That was when I discovered how to make it invisible. But alas, I was too lazy to undo the fugly design. So I had to repeat the fugly design for the left side of the back as well. At least the fronts are kind of spotless. Lol.

I doubt those stitches will survive a few machine washes. Well, if they come off, I might have to do a stronger back stitch.

Thrifty or...?

2011-01-18T20:09:00.000+08:00

So far, this is my fourth semester here at NUS and I have only bought one textbook. Linear Algebra. And that's because the tutorial questions came from there and there was no way I could find an e-book because it was co-written by our dear lecturer.

And the psychology textbook was courtesy of Nick. It's still with me, oops. As for the rest, either I found an e-book or I just couldn't be bothered. Sometimes, I think I'm too thrifty. But now that I think about it, it's not that I can't afford the books. It's more like... I'm trying to prove something. Or maybe I just think that education should be free. (Except that the books require effort and publishing which equates to money needed)

It's weird huh. Sometimes I can walk a few bus stops just to save a few cents but I spend a bomb on other stuff. There was one time when I was so obsessed with ultra quality bed sheets that I just unload everything only.

But anyway, the best things in life are free. You're only happy if you enjoy what you have.

I was mistaken...

2011-01-16T13:55:00.000+08:00

My Monday and Tuesday were slack, but my Thursday and Friday are horrible.

And it's only the first week. So much homework already...

A mini software project due by week 3 and I don't even have a team yet. Hahaha!

The UTown writing module is quite fun though. I'm so glad that it replaces one of my core modules.

Time to work hard.

First two days of school

2011-01-11T22:48:00.000+08:00

Is damn slack!!!

Haha.

I think I shouldn't relax so much.

After school I've been going out and just... shopping.

To be continued.

Amazing live wall on your desktop!

2011-01-08T06:40:00.002+08:00

Title sounds like spam huh?

Found this review over here
http://www.freewaregenius.com/2011/01/07/okozo-desktop-display-animated-flash-based-interactive-wallpapers-on-your-desktop/

This is amazing! Although being a minimalistic person I probably won't be utilising it...

To overload or not to overload

2011-01-05T13:10:00.001+08:00

That is the question.

Every semester I have this urge to overload.
It's incomprehensible.

Rationally speaking, there is no real purpose in overloading unless I want to do an internship.

This semester, I finally found a core module to overload that fits with my timetable. Now the question is, should I?

Well, the decision has to be made on 10 Jan, so I guess I'll just lay back for now.

Horoscopes

2010-12-23T21:05:00.000+08:00

You know, I don't really hate horoscopes. They're kind of fun to read sometimes.

What I hate is people believing in them.

I find them to be so restricting. When you believe in them, you restrict yourself to those beliefs. And when the mind is filled, it can't take in any more stuff. Any evidence that is contradicting will be dismissed. And you hold on even more strongly to those beliefs. Then your mind is closed. It's like, believing everything that the church has to say.

Now I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. Perhaps it's good that you have a tether, something to cling to in case you are lost.

But to me, it's a bad thing. I'm a free spirit, and I definitely resist someone telling me what to do, or what I can be.

When you walk one path, you miss out on other paths.

Obsession

2010-12-23T20:52:00.000+08:00

I tend to get obsessed over certain things very easily. I fixate my eyes on one thing, and I can get stuck for a long time. Even when I'm doing other things, my mind always goes back to that one thing. It can happen to anything. People, math problems, material things. In short, it's just damn hard for me to LET GO.

I've been trying so hard to protect myself. Because if I fall, I fall DEEP. And it's damn hard to climb out of that hole. And so I've been trying the KISS principle. Keep It Simple and Stupid. Well I guess that's kind of an obsession to be simple. Lol.

The truth is, I just feel too strongly. And I love to pretend that I don't, and maybe sometimes I almost believe that I do! And it tears me up inside without me knowing it. I'm holding so much inside, that sometimes it's like I'm gonna burst.

Sometimes it manages to escape and I do things without inhibition. Then I can't believe how crazy I am. But I am crazy.

I don't know, man. How do I stop this?

Singing workshop

2010-12-21T23:13:00.000+08:00

So today I went to a singing workshop at focusmusic with Tiffany thanks to her recommendation.

This is what I learnt:

When singing low or high, use resonance from diaphragm.

Open mouth for more resonance and faster breathing.

Sing to beat. E.g. heavy beat - heavy emphasis etc.

Pronounce words correctly.

Paying attention

2010-12-21T23:10:00.000+08:00

It's been a long time since I went out with someone who'll pay full attention to me.
Everybody seems so distracted with their phones.

I mean, seriously. Some virtual world is more important than me?
No, I refuse to do the same thing.

I really wish I didn't mind, but I do.

Ode to the nice guys

2010-12-21T16:07:00.002+08:00

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

Fu-zu Jen, SEAS/WH, 2003

No intelligence > Intelligence

2010-12-21T15:08:00.000+08:00

Miss Understood: "Intellectuals have a better understanding of the world and therefore see just how f***ed up it is. Stupid people,on the other hand, live in their own little bubbles and pretty much create their own existance, far away from the problems of the real world. Afterall, ignorance is bliss."

Maybe it's easier to be stupid...

But then, I don't want to be stupid... Because, intelligence is beautiful...

FMR!

2010-12-21T14:25:00.002+08:00

a.k.a Fk My Results!, or, My Results are Fked!, or Results Fked Me!

So here's the breakdown:

ST2334 - Statistics (A)
I almost always do well in Maths modules - I should totally do a Maths minor.

GEM2900 - Uncertainty and Probability (B+)
I think it was because of this module that I got A for stats. I love you Chen Peiyi!

LSM2201A - Experimental Biochemistry (B-)
I probably could have done better, but it's a life science module so I guess it's acceptable.

LSM2101 - Metabolism and Regulation (C+)
Fk you! I studied damn freaking hard for this module. But once again the life science modules work their voodoo magic. Grrr

CS2102 - Database Systems (C+)
I messed up this one, I swear. But then I didn't really like this module anyway.

ES1102 - English for Academic Purposes (C+)
WTF? Are you kidding me? It's 0MC, but still... My English ain't that bad! Or maybe it is... *sulks*

So, my CAP has increased to 3.19, but it's still a long climb to honours. All thanks to last sem. I'm gonna retake Organic Chemistry this sem, so wish me luck man. I'll really need it.

Sometimes I really feel like giving up... Maybe I'm just not cut out for university life.

glassworks

2010-12-17T20:40:00.000+08:00

by imperterrito

Close your eyes and feel it...

Reminiscence

2010-12-17T03:05:00.001+08:00

I find that as I grow older, I tend to look back on the "good old days". Is that how old people think? You know, I used to resent how the older people revisit the past all the time. Maybe because I was young and hadn't walked much on the path of life? But now that there's a trail, I would look back on it sometimes. Well I do get that warm fuzzy feeling when I look back on the good ole days. But I suspect it is all a trick of the mind. Memories are so malleable, they might change according to how you feel right now. Sure, they are good old days, but what could possibly be better than now? Living is a miracle and if we abandon this moment, we might as well not live at all.

Oh memory, ye double-edged sword.

Jfreeze - Bubble tea killer

2010-12-15T13:30:00.000+08:00

Last Saturday, I had one of the best drinks of my life.

Jollibean J-Freeze ~ Matcha with Azuki beans

Ice-blended green tea with with azuki beans. The ice is blended so well, it tastes like ice cream! And I'm a fan of green tea ice cream! It's not rough like ice kachang. Wow, there's simply no words to describe it. It's heavenly! And it could probably replace a meal too. It's damn filling. The price is $3 or 2.80 without the beans. I must say the price is just right! It's totally worth it! I would buy this over any bubble tea, ANY DAY! In fact, I'm officially quitting bubble tea and jumping ship over to Jollibean!

Sorry for the crappy picture. It really doesn't do the drink justice. But it would be weird not to post a picture, right?

Bubble tea killer gogogogo!

Super damage!

2010-12-09T18:51:00.000+08:00

Darn, I just spent a bomb. Sometimes I wonder if I'm really thrifty or not. I realise that I usually spend my money in big chunks.

So, within a month...

I couldn't resist the Dell U2311H. It was totally a steal at $279. I found a two-month old U2311H for $250! I should have haggled more though. But I'm not a fan of haggling. I'm a lousy trader! Anyway the price's very cheap for an IPS monitor. Granted, it's e-IPS, a lousier version of IPS, but it still trumps the usual TN monitors. TN = Twisted Nematic, IPS = In-Plane Switching. The market is saturated with TN monitors right now. TN is cheap, but has lousy colour reproduction compared to IPS. So I upgraded my 20" TN monitor to a 23" IPS monitor. I'm impressed with the increase in screen area. Placing my Samsung 206BW and Dell U2311H side by side, however, I couldn't really differentiate the colour reproduction. There are some differences, but it's hard to tell for the untrained eye. But of course I will never go back to a TN monitor. I hope the market comes out with mainstream IPS monitors soon. IPS really owns TN. I managed to sell my old trusty 206BW for $85 on Ebay. I however, regret not putting the price higher. I guess I was just impatient. I hate to see things collecting dust. There was a $95 offer in the forums... Argh, $10...

Damage = 250 - 85 = 165

Of course, with a bigger monitor, I totally NEEDED a better graphics card. I was sick of ATI's drivers, so I decided to support the green camp - nVIDIA. Seriously nVIDIA's drivers are soooo much better. I like ATI's hardware though. Oh well. Sometimes you just can't have your cake and eat it.

Damage = 275 - 70 = 205

I was sick of my noisy CPU cooler too. So I decided to get a better one. And who else but Coolermaster would I go for? I really like their products. They're cheap, and they work well. Super value for money. I bought the Hyper212+. It's awesome! It was a pain to attach it though. I had to REMOVE the motherboard! My casing does have a hole at the back, but it didn't seem to be built for AMD CPUs. So I couldn't attach one final screw at the back. I tried very hard to do everything without REMOVING the motherboard, but I broke the bracket of the original cooler by mistake. :(

Oh I also bought some 2GB DDR2 ram as well. Damn expensive man. I wished I had bought it during the crazily in supply period. They were $25 a piece then! Now it's twice the price. Wasted man.

Damage = 48 + 56 = 104

-----

My chair broke. So I went shopping at IKEA! Good chairs are reallllyyyy expensive man. In the end, I bought a $219 one. I was very tempted to get the $399 one, since it was approved for office use and would probably last 10 years or more. I think there was warranty too! But I just couldn't bring myself to buy it... While walking to check out, I saw a very very nice wall lamp. It was $29, but I couldn't stand my old yucky flabby wall lamp anymore. It took some trouble to attach it, and I even contemplated buying a drill, but I managed to make do with the old hole on the wall. Somehow. It isn't really perfect, but who cares.

Damage = 219 + 29 = 248

---

That's for last month, but don't forget about the Milestone XT which cost $520, and the new router + adapter combo which cost like $300...

Whew. Sometimes I wish I had deep coffers.

Anyway, that's enough damage for this year man. I must try to save up my money. I must return my bank account to its original state! Sometimes I don't even feel like going out, because going out = spend money. Hikikomori FTW.

Sorry seems to be the easiest word

2010-12-03T14:14:00.001+08:00

I'm sick of hearing the word "sorry". It's so overused, it doesn't mean a thing anymore. Granted there are many cases in which the word "sorry" is appropriate, but there are many cases in which it's just a filler word. Something to say when you don't know what else to say. Something that will apparently ease your guilt. It's a frickin' selfish word, I tell ya.

Words are cheap, deeds are priceless. Saying sorry is okay if you follow up with some action to show your remorse. But no. Some just like to repeat their mistakes. Then what's the point of saying sorry?

Please, please. Say sorry only when you truly mean it. Don't say it for the sake of saying it, please. Save the word.

Sorry seems to be the hardest word? Sorry, times have changed.

Edit:
Okay after I posted this I saw this on lifehacker.com
http://jezebel.com/5704364/social-minefield-how-to-say-youre-sorry

Maturity

2010-11-28T23:03:00.001+08:00

People form impressions quickly. While I do not approve of that, it is the norm and probably a result of evolution so I will not fault them. Perhaps it's better that way.

Now many have said that I act younger than my age. I concur. Sometimes, I find it amusing that people expect me to do childish stuff. Especially my handwriting. People are surprised that my handwriting looks... so mature. Or rather, people were. I'm probably old enough now that people aren't that surprised anymore. Sometimes, I find it annoying that people think I'm childish, but I brought that upon myself. No, wait, I'm not irked by the fact that they think that I'm childish, but more irked by the fact that they never look beyond. Right, I know I'm not that mature, but I like to believe that I do have some mature qualities inside of me. But then, what is maturity? Maybe it is a childish notion to think that I'm mature. For which child doesn't like to think that they are mature? And, is it good to be mature? How mature is mature?

I find it hard to define maturity. To me, it is something very intangible. Now, perhaps there is at least an agreed standard by which we can call people "mature". That is, good reason and high stability. How mature can one be? Who do we compare to?

Can maturity and childishness coexist? That is the question.

So, do I have low or high self-esteem?

2010-11-28T20:18:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, I wonder. I used to think that I have high self-esteem. But now I'm not so sure.

Perhaps my low self-esteem was lurking under the guise of high self-esteem.

What do I do when I'm not sure? Google search, of course.

Ahh, this looks like a reliable page - http://ezinearticles.com/?How-To-Tell-If-You-Have-Low-Self-Esteem-and-What-to-Do-About-it-If-You-Do&id=2465860

Let's see...

People with low self-esteem have a low estimation of their inherent worth. They tend to see themselves as inadequate, incompetent, unworthy, less than others, and unlovable. Low self-esteem is closely related to low self-efficacy. Self-efficacy means that you have power to produce effects.

Nope. Not true to a large extent.

People who value themselves poorly do not believe that they have the power or the ability to make positive things happen in their lives. They believe that they have many limitations and are incapable of the things that they see others be able to accomplish. They tend to see themselves as a victim of circumstances and have a hard time connecting their own decisions and behavior to their outcomes. They don't believe that they have much influence or power over their own lives.

Definitely not true. I'm a firm believer in the power of actions.

This sense of low self-efficacy also extends to not being able to trust their feelings and judgement. They tend to have a hard time sensing "trustworthiness" in others. They distrust their own gut reactions to others. Since they have a great deal of difficulty being assertive, they tend toward extremes of passivity or aggression. They may tend to let people walk all over them, until they reach some threshold of tolerance, then they withdraw into passive aggression or become aggressive. Or they may generally present an aggressive stance that keeps people at a distance.

Hmm... Somewhere in between, I guess?

When people trample on their boundaries, they either don't notice, don't believe that there is anything they can do about it, or think that it's because of something that they did.
These self-doubting folks tend to people-please, trying to project an image of what they imagine others want them to be.

Probably not true.

Self-esteem and self-concept are deeply related. Self-concept is that world view of self, or how you think about who you are. Self-concept includes beliefs, attitudes, and opinions that you hold about yourself and your relationships with the environment and people in it. People with low-self esteem have great difficulty describing self, their beliefs, and opinions. They don't know who they are.

Hmm... Who am I? Just the average person. What do I believe in? Nothing. Opinions? Pfff. Yep I totally have great difficulty with this.

They tend to see self as a sum of the roles they play and usually believe that they don't do well at the roles. They are self-deprecating. People with low self-esteem engage in negative self-talk. They say hurtful things to themselves inside their own heads that they would not say to others. When complimented they down play the compliment with qualifications or rejection like, "yes, but", or "you're just saying that; you don't mean it". Self-deprecating people focus on the negative aspects of themselves, while ignoring, discounting, or negating positive attributes.

Yeah I do say negative things to myself about 10% of the time...

People suffering from low self-esteem tend to have chaotic and conflicted relationships. They have trouble communicating wants and needs. They tend to expect others to know what they want and need and to give it to them without having to be asked. They expect that because that's how they interact with others. Self-effacing folks tend to feel angry and hurt when others don't reciprocate and do the same thing. They believe them to be self-centered and selfish. Conflict is inevitable due to inability to take risks and put themselves out there.

If they can't risk letting down defenses long enough to directly tell others what they want and need, the potential for confusion and conflict is immense. Without assertiveness no one can be direct and effective in their communication with others. Folks with low self-esteem tend to vacillate back and forth from passive to aggressive or to engage in passive-aggressive communication. They tend to be emotion driven. They over-react to interpersonal situations in their lives. They believe that their perception of an interpersonal event is the way that it is or was, that there is no other possible way to view it.

Probably to a small extent.

They don't know how to be truly intimate, so they tend to engage in pursuing/distancing dynamics. This is where one person needs a higher level of closeness at any given moment than the other person. The person with the higher need for closeness takes the other's lower need for closeness as evidence of a lack of caring, regard, or interest, and pursuing reassurance that they are still loved. People with low self-esteem have trouble being intimate with others, because to do so, they have to let down their defenses and risk exposing who they really are to someone else. They can't let others see who they really are, because they don't know who they really are. If you don't have a solid sense of self, you can't share it with another person. That is what intimacy is.

Hmm... I do know how to be intimate, but I have trouble being intimate with others... Maybe it's because I'm scared of exposing myself? I'm not sure...

Sometimes they are self-sabotaging. They may fear success, or failure, or both. That fear is acted out in subtle ways that keeps things status quo. Fortune-telling of dire consequences of taking chances on change for growth and development keeps them stuck. They fear change. Fear of the unknown is much worse than any discontent and discomfort that they have with present circumstances.

I kind of fear success and failure sometimes, so much that I might try to sabotage myself. Hmm... Change? I like it sometimes, I guess.

Fortunately, it is possible to improve one's self-esteem and to change one's self-concept. To improve self concept it is necessary to get to know oneself. This includes getting to know and appreciate one's body, feelings, thoughts, relationships, tastes, opinions, and motives. This is a process. In the midst of self-discovery, it is appropriate to practice self-acceptance, recognizing oneself as less than perfect, yet still worthwhile. Changing how you think is necessary to improve self-esteem. Using cognitive therapy to challenge negative cognitive distortions about oneself, the world, and the future will help. A change in feelings follows a change in thinking.

Right. I try my best to come up with helpful self-talk. I mean, you should treat yourself well, right? Even if no one else does, at least you have yourself!

Willingness to risk is crucial. While practicing taking risks, one should begin looking for the benefits of those risks. You cannot learn new things without risking. With trying out new things and discovering one's own competence, more self-efficacy is gained. Taking risks to reveal glimpses of the real person you are, is usually met with acceptance from others rather than their anticipated abandonment. These outcomes help increase self-confidence and a sense of worthiness. When you take the risk to tell others what you want, need, and feel, you learn assertiveness and practice intimacy skills. When you spend time thinking about the connections between your decisions and your situations, you begin to take responsibility for your own decisions and happiness. When you take responsibility for self, you are empowered.

Whether you are dealing with addiction issues, emotional or mental health issues, relationship issues, or need some additional living skills, my website is available to you. The "Links" page offers a wide range of resources for additional help. There is a "Recommended Readings" page and an "Ask Peggy" column. My site is a work in progress with additional features, articles, and resources being added to it on a regular basis. Check it out at http://www.peggyferguson.com

Well said. Thank you very much. I will keep all that in mind!

Well this is a just for fun, lighthearted post. Generally, I have pretty high self-esteem but there are times when I'm down too. It's pretty hard to define things, since I believe the world isn't black and white as some people do. There's pink, purple, blue, orange, etc... SO many shades!

So, who am I? For me to know and for you to find out! Not that I know, though...

About time... What's nex?

2010-11-28T19:58:00.000+08:00

For billions of years, Serangoon(that's where I live) had no shopping malls, no libraries. It does have those small shops littered around, and of course Serangoon Gardens(where all those expensive restaurants and pubs are; not to mention the infamous Chomp-Chomp). But no shopping malls. No, Kovan's Heartland Mall is not counted. Anyway, that's not the point.

Let's fast forward to November 2010. A big shopping mall has been erected. In fact, it's the biggest shopping mall in the North East area. There will also be a library. About time, I say! I was very excited that my little ulu area finally had a modern, air-conditioned shopping mall! But then I thought about it. What's the point of another shopping mall?

But that's beside the point. I'm supposed to be evangelizing nex. Currently, nex is quite empty. Most shops have not moved in yet. But from what I have seen, there are some nice tenants here. Some crazy new shops like Freshness Burger and Barcelonas and Drink Tea. (Well at least they are new to me) And of course, Cold Storage(yay) and the you-guessed-it, Fairprice Xtra. I like. Apparently there's Wendy's too. Nice.

Anyway, I tried Drink Tea, and I must say that it's yet. another. bubble. tea. shop. with. overpriced. prices. I should totally cut down on drinking bubble tea. I realised it's a big waste of money. I find the most value for money to be the everpresent Sweettalk as well as the one at Bencoolen Plaza(must thank Steph for introducing that to me omg).

So what's nex? Yet another shopping mall.

And what's next? Probably more shopping malls and bubble tea shops. And the government says that Singapore has no space.

Self-improvement books

2010-11-25T11:11:00.001+08:00

I always feel better about myself after reading a self-improvement book or two. However, some people seem to be embarrassed about reading them.

Perhaps reading self-improvement books implies that you suck and need to become better. But that's not true. Everyone benefits from it. Or maybe people are embarrassed that they have to get better from reading a book. Everyone should read self-improvement books. It's always good to improve yourself, and to learn new insights. Books are one of the greatest teachers.

Module of the semester

2010-11-25T10:51:00.003+08:00

Goes to "Understanding Uncertainty and Statistics", GEM2900. Yes it might get a bit technical at times, but it certainly(see what I did there) helped me see things in a new light. Especially the way people misinterpret statistics. It was horrifying. Sally Clark, a mum was convicted of killing her two children because the lawyer misinterpreted the low chance of two babies dying naturally as the chance that she was innocent. Imagine having to go to prison for a crime you didn't commit and right after your two babies died in a row. How cruel.

Anyway, I love this module's exam. It's the only one which I know how to do 95% of the questions. Also, Peiyi rocks. I am totally gonna scout for the modules she teaches and take them. Joking joking. I hope my other statistics module is as doable as this. Fat hope. But I will do my best.

There was another exam on the same day as the GEM2900 exam. Metabolism and Regulation. A life science module, AKA my bane. So I didn't expect much. As expected, there were some lame memory work questions. Remember and win, no-brainer type of questions. I really hate those type of questions, but alas, department of biological sciences is cruel. No surprise. But I was able to answer more questions than I expected. I'll probably get a C again. I was hoping for a B, but C will have to do. Too much effort needed to score good grades in comparison to other types of modules. Btw, I like the modules, but the exams really are sucky.

On a side note, flash cards are really useful for those life science modules. At least it spices things up. And it really works. I did quite well for the mid terms without much effort. But still...

Two more exams left. Wish me luck! Actually, I'll need more than luck. Argh.

I love exams. I'm not kidding. Call me weird or whatever, but I love answering questions. Shading those cute little circles on the answer sheet. Writing long ass answers to questions I know how to do and giving stupid lame answers to the rest of the questions. Yeah, people would probably freak out if I told them that. LOL. What's more, exam period is usually more relaxed than school time. SO I really don't understand how people hate exams. Okay, just to make things clear, I love doing exams but I hate exams. There's a difference.

I love shopping...

2010-11-23T18:51:00.000+08:00

...at super big supermarkets. I get immersed in the wide variety of choices and become fascinated by all the different ingredients and how one product is different from the other. And there's no one around to bother you so you can take all the time in the world to look and choose. And with that time passes by so quickly...

Your welcome

2010-11-19T17:30:00.004+08:00

My welcome? What do you mean?

It always irks me... Technically it is considered correct if you read it as "youR welcome". But people! There's a difference between you're and your! Not to be a grammar nazi but this is a very simple thing... Is it really worth sacrificing readability so that you can type two characters less?

Ever failed?

2010-11-18T22:59:00.000+08:00

By Pretty/Ugly Design

Or better yet. Reframe failure into feedback. Erase failure from your dictionary. There is no failure, only feedback.

Perhaps the feedback won't help you grow. But at least you've learned something from it. Whether you act on that feedback or not is up to you.

Or maybe sometimes you'll grow the wrong way. But that's okay. There's no time to be worrying about that, because you've got a life to live.

The little things do matter

2010-11-16T02:28:00.000+08:00

So I was thinking... Little things do add up. $1 saved everyday - $365 in a year. 15mins of something everyday - expert in a year? It's so much easier to take little steps at a time, than it is to take a big step and risk tripping. Something I learned while reading "The Vigorous Mind" a few years back. I don't know how I stumbled upon that book, but I did and I'm glad that I did. I think it was at West Coast Plaza... Popular... Why did I even go there in the first place? In any event, I could not resist buying that book. It had a gray unassuming cover, but I could not take my eyes off it. That says a lot, considering that I don't buy books that often. (Probably not even once a year). I'm a voracious reader and my income probably won't be able to take it. Libraries rule :)

Anyway, I digress. One innovative idea I learned while reading it is that learning one thing will make your other aspects stronger as well. And they don't have to be related as well. The point is to be a stronger and more flexible person. So how do you go about learning things when you have "no time"? The book suggests that we take a little bit of time everyday. And I totally agree with it. I'm sick of people always saying, "I have no time". Is 15 mins a day too much to spare? 15 mins a day really adds up. Don't put off doing something because it's too big of a stretch for your schedule. Take little steps at a time.

Rome wasn't built in a day, was it?

Sugar, sugar, everywhere

2010-11-14T23:45:00.000+08:00

Ahh, the ubiquitous high fructose corn syrup. It's everywhere. This morning, I ate hotcakes from McDonalds. Corn syrup is one of the ingredients in the maple syrup provided. In fact, their maple syrup is FAKE. Notice the "artificial maple flavour". I wonder if the maple syrup provided at "Strictly Pancakes" is real. What does real maple syrup taste like anyway?

I just bought this 4-pack "Anlene Concentrate" drink. It's supposed to be healthy, what with high calcium content and essential bone nutrients etc. I look at the ingredients and ahaha! Sucrose is there!

It's the same for the bread I eat almost everyday. Sugar is added!

Refined sugar is everywhere. And that's what making everyone fat. (Except me of course.)

Chilli sauces, tomato sauces, whatever. They all have sugar in them.

Even the health food known as honey has, you guessed it, lots of sugar in it!

Will it ever go away? Smoking and sugar. Those two idiots - are they here to stay?

Super small... Wow

2010-11-13T21:11:00.002+08:00

I just bought this super amazingly small wireless adapter. The adapter is smaller than the USB connector. WTF right?! Amazing... Simply amazing... Wow... Truly the world's smallest wireless USB adapter...

Edimax EW-7811Un

Once again

2010-11-12T07:38:00.002+08:00

Something broke in him. And it would remain that way. Nothing could be done. And he made a new resolve.

And so despair was born and hope forever lost.

Alive, but so dead.

Tainted for eternity.

It would be a long, long time before his sins are absolved.

I'm grateful

2010-11-10T23:00:00.000+08:00

I'm grateful for many things.

I was born without disabilities - I can't imagine not being able to run around or not being able to see anything.

I have enough to eat everyday, and surplus to boot.

I have a family.

I have kind friends.

I have somewhere to belong to.

I have an education.

I'm smart enough.

Hebe.

有时候

2010-11-09T21:04:00.000+08:00

有时候，我真的很想放弃。
有时候，我觉得活在这个世界没意义。
多少才足够？

书也是你们逼我读的。
书，不容易读。
可是为什么你们总让我觉得内疚？
我知道工作不容易。
我知道养家不容易。
但是读书也没有你们想象的那么容易。
现在，只光读书是不够的。

你们常说，“你们只需要读书，很难吗？”
可是读书不只是读书。
你们不会了解的，我也不需要你们了解。
也许你们的确比我辛苦。
但我可以说，我现在的确很辛苦。
我不知道你们知不知道。
我天天一副莫不关心的样子，你们也不能探索什么吧。
我也不想让你们担心哦。
可是，有时闷在心里真的很难过。
我只求你们不要天天让我内疚。

是的，我真的不愿意读书，不过既然已经开始，也应该做一个了断。

The Forer Effect

2010-11-09T20:37:00.000+08:00

According to http://www.skepdic.com/forer.html

The Forer effect refers to the tendency of people to rate sets of statements as highly accurate for them personally even though the statements could apply to many people.

Psychologist Bertram R. Forer (1914-2000) found that people tend to accept vague and general personality descriptions as uniquely applicable to themselves without realizing that the same description could be applied to just about anyone.

Precisely the reason why I always take horoscopes and other hocus pocus with a grain of salt. The descriptions are so generic that they could apply to any average person. But of course, the average person does not realise it. For example, you believe that one part of the description fits you very well. Then you will tend to notice new information that reaffirms your belief while discounting any evidence to the contrary.

Yes, they are fun to read and all but I wouldn't let them determine my character. I am who I want to be.

Another amazing painting of a girl...

2010-11-08T04:53:00.000+08:00

MICKAELA MARY LEROY by phoenixlu

Lies, all lies...

2010-11-06T23:38:00.003+08:00

[After the previous post, I feel emo... So here is a rant...]

Substance, substance... Need more substance... I tire of getting cheated. Everything is a lie...

Too much lies... I have become so skeptical. In fact, I don't believe in anything that people say anymore. I'll just pretend to believe... Because who wants to be doubted? Yep, I'm lying too... There is so much lies in the world anyway. My policy is that - as long as the lie is not harmful, it's fine. And that is a double-edged sword... I begin to doubt anyone saying good stuff. And I have become so nonchalant about things. I'm not surprised if people betray my trust anyway. In fact, I usually put my trust in people fully without really trusting them. Yeah, it's contradictory, but that's how I roll... One good thing about this is that I tend to encourage myself not to make snap judgments... And sometimes, I am quite surprised about who people really are and what they can do... In fact, I will be very touched if people just do small things that show that they can be trusted...

Also, I believe in the power of the situation. It doesn't matter how one behaves normally. When it comes to different situations, people act unpredictably sometimes... To me, it is always a pleasure to see surprising things come out from certain people... I think that is a pretty rare thing these days, given that so many people judge so quickly... Well it's certainly reasonable since time is scarce and first impressions are all you have... But I am always hopeful. I always have faith. I am skeptical yet hopeful at the same time. Because things are always not what they seem... I am more of an objective person; so sometimes when you say something I would not agree so readily... In fact I may come off as a disagreeable person, when I am just unsurprised and objective...

I think this all comes with not watching too much media and news. It's good to learn about current affairs and such, but I think too much isn't good... The media is always biased, no matter what they propose to be... And when you read the media and magazines, you tend to think that rare things are actually quite common and possible. Like accidents and millionaires and successful people... When you put the focus on them, you forget about the more important things in life... You forget to be satisfied with yourself, with life... You forget to think for yourself, you forget to see the larger picture... The media is evil... I would never encourage my kids to watch TV. And advertisements are just fucked up. I don't even know where to begin... (As an example, notice how smoking is usually portrayed to be a cool thing, in movies and such... Fuck smoking.) And those advertisements that target kids? They are just outright evil. But maybe it's better that they exist. Better that they get exposed to bad stuff and have time to learn from it than never get exposed and get corrupted totally when they are exposed to it.

Just like religion... But that is a topic for another day.

//Very personal
I have trust issues with women, because the hurt I experienced from them outweigh the positives... And I'm guilty of focusing too much on their bad points. That is why I never chase them... I think some of them were probably disappointed by my inaction. But I'm scarred and scared... And so far, nobody has been worthy of me chasing them... (Or maybe that's a lie to protect my ego) And here it is - it's out. A most disturbing fact about me which will change the way you ever think about me again.

And here's something laughable... My fantasy is that someone will come and sweep my feet off, prove that I have been wrong all along, and console my heart... But of course, that is something which will never happen, because only girls wait for Prince Charming... No such thing as Princess Charming... I may act quite masculine sometimes, but I am also quite feminine in my way of thinking... I'm the type who will be willing to be a househusband. But then again, it's quite impossible... What have I to offer anyway? From an evolutionary standpoint, this is not likely to happen...

Sigh, I really do have much emotional baggage huh? But the cheerful side of me is genuine... I don't pretend to be cheerful, and I probably wear my heart on the sleeve... This sounds contradictory to what I said about pretending... But it's possible... I do get hurt easily, but I also recover easily... Or maybe I pretend to recover easily? I don't know... There are so many things about myself that I don't know, but there are also many things about myself that I do know...

Why do men like longer hair on women? Why do women do the things they do? (And a rant...)

2010-11-06T23:34:00.000+08:00

An abstract from http://www.peepat.com/blog/helath_is_wealth/why_men_prefer_long_hair.aspx

Tamás Bereczkei, PhD, professor of psychology performed a study in which images of female faces were given varying lengths of hair and then evaluated by men on their attractiveness. “Longer hair had a significant positive effect on the ratings of a woman’s attractiveness; shorter styles did not,” says Bereczkei, who notes that long hair increases the perception of good genes. “Hair is thought to be a track record of your health.” One accurate indicator of health is physical attractiveness; another is hair. Healthy women have lustrous, shiny hair, whereas the hair of sickly people loses its luster. Because hair grows slowly, shoulder-length hair reveals several years of a woman's health status.

Evolutionary psychology - study of the adaptations made due to selection pressure in natural selection. Well, it is certainly true that hair is quite a good indicator of health. I mean, if you look at just the hair from behind a women, you can roughly gauge how old they are. Of course, that's moot if they did something to their hair, such as dyeing it or applying cosmetic products on it. Which brings us to...

So, from this evolutionary psychology perspective, and assuming that women are wanting to make themselves more attractive to men, it would make sense for older and less healthy women to dye their hair as carefully as possible such that it simulates the appearance of the hair of healthy young women.

But it would not make any sense for young, healthy women to dye their hair, since this would make it less attractive.

And indeed, twenty years ago sensible young women virtually never dyed their hair - except when they wanted to signal their membership of some 'tribe' (such as punks or goths, or being 'arty' ) and this was 1. the less sensible women, and 2. a distinct minority. A proportion of young women also signalled their sexual availability by bleaching their hair blond - although this made their hair very obviously artificial and less attractive.

That's taken from http://charltonteaching.blogspot.com/2010/09/dyed-brown-hair-in-young-women.html.

Well, I do see a lot of women with dyed hair. And it certainly puzzles me that young ladies ruin their hair by dyeing it. Vanity? Fashion? And some even have weird colours. Some of them do look great though. But personally, I feel that black hair is most suitable for Asian women.

I'm also confused about the rationale behind painting nails. Seriously? Does it really make it look better? From a guy's viewpoint, I would certainly prefer all-natural nails. To be honest, painted nails look really fake and ugly to me. It's especially puzzling if they have very nice natural nails and they cover it all with paint. But nail polish is a different thing because I think it makes nails look nicer.

Lack of time

2010-11-04T13:25:00.000+08:00

I can never understand when people say they have a lack of time to do something.

Are they really so busy that they don't even have the time to do it? I bet it's just not important enough for them to do. I mean, there are so many "time-wasters" that we do. Waiting for bus: 5 mins. Bus/Train ride: 30 mins. 35 mins. And if you travel to and fro, that's 70 mins. 70 mins!!! 70 mins everyday! Can you imagine what you can accomplish with that?

Then there are little things like bathing quicker, eating quicker... But I would not recommend that. Also, it isn't that hard to spend just 15 mins learning something. For example, you want to learn the guitar. Then take 15 mins to learn it everyday! Don't tell me it's not impossible. Try it! Do it in little chunks, and you realise that you have accomplished so much eventually. It's the little things that matter. And it's easier to do it in little steps.

And why is everybody in such a rush? Life is not a race. Screw time! Focus on what's most important right now. That's right, right now is the most important. Please don't dream your life away. If you do that, then you do not deserve to regret. It will be sad if you wonder about what could have been instead of looking at what's going on around you.

Also, sleep! I don't understand why students like to deprive themselves of sleep. And the worst thing is, they think they feel normal, but it's only because they are used to it! Sleep deprivation can affect concentration more than you can imagine. No time to finish work, really? What if sleeping more allowed you to concentrate more so that you could finish work faster? But then again, I'm guilty of that lately. I have not been sleeping well, because it's hard to sleep frickin early and wake up at 5.43am when it's still dark.

Anyway, I'm so sleepy...

Gender

2010-11-02T17:06:00.001+08:00

Wow, for the third time in a day? I can't believe it! This is just a short post though.

Times have changed so much, yet some people still think the old way, in terms of gender divisions. All those "man outside, woman inside" crap is now no longer applicable, especially in a bustling city like f**king Singapore.

This is especially true for the more highly educated. Yes, gender equality is good and all, but some people still can't get to terms with it. Now that there is a big gender overlap, the two sexes have almost equal earning power (yeah I know, men still earn more than women though). But they have also lost some things and retained some things. Women have lost their domesticity. With an income, they can now afford to depend on themselves for silly (I jest) stuff such as shopping and shopping. But they have also lost the need to learn how to cook and stuff like that. So why do they even need to marry anymore?!

You could say the same for men. In my little circle of friends, more men can cook than women can. And taking care of domestic stuff is easy even for men. So why the hell would I want to marry a woman for?! If I want to marry someone now, it's probably more for companionship than anything else. (And of course for kids, duh). I don't expect too much of them really. But that's just me. Gawd, I hope I don't sound MCP. But perhaps I'm one at heart. It's just that, nobody has really impressed me... In fact, I remain quite disappointed...

Damn I just wrote some pretty controversial stuff. But it's good to get it off my heart. I hope nobody gets offended.

About my experience with my core modules

2010-11-02T16:26:00.056+08:00

Woot... I have so many things to say today that I'm blogging the second time in a day! Mezurashi eh?

So far, out of all my cores, I have taken Computing modules, Maths modules, Life Science modules, Statistics... Forget the Organic Chem module, because it's too freaking disgusting to mention... I'll have to retake that freaking disgusting module and I don't even know if I will pass the second time. Why the hell is it my core?! Anyway, I digress.

So far, I've had the most fun with Computing and Maths modules... They're interesting and the content is like brain teasers... They really make you think... And they keep you involved! +1 for engaging! (And also because I got my only A+ there)

Life Science modules are quite interesting but the exams and tests SUCK TO THE MAX. Seriously. I mean come on, it's an university for god's sake! And here they are emphasizing memory work. They claim to test your concepts, but they are just testing you on how well you remember the fine details... Which is good and all, but I hate it! I am the kind of person who will never read a book twice and you ask me to regurgitate stuff?! NO THANKS! I especially hate those kind of questions where they expect you to remember some random molecule and what it does. And some questions are only tricky because they are actually really simple but you have to read the question really carefully. And I'm such a careless person that I always get tricked. Yes I know, learning to read the question carefully is an important skill, but still, that's cheap... Doing Life Science modules is like playing games of Concentration... I prefer my brain teasers, thank you...

As for Statistics, I find it interesting. With all that probability and uncertainty, you learn to look at things from a whole new different perspective. For example, it's actually not rare to find someone with a birthday same as yours. To learn more, check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthday_problem And other eye-opening stuff. But as usual, exams suck. Haha.

I hope I can survive... I like learning stuff, but the grades get to me sometimes... And sometimes, I just want to give up. I hate studying for the sake of grades.